062 | Rediscovering Yourself: Identity Beyond Motherhood with Dr. Phoebe Ajayi

You’re praised for the baby.
But not asked about your body.
You’re celebrated for becoming a mother.
But rarely supported as you grieve the version of you that no one else seemed to notice disappeared.

This episode is for every Black woman who gave birth and then wondered where she went.

In this featured National Black Girl Month™ 2025 conversation, Dr. Phoebe Ajayi—a physician, maternal health advocate, and author of After Birth: Postpartum Recovery of the Body and Mind—joins us to name the invisible weight of postpartum identity loss. From her clinical roots in Nigeria to practicing medicine in the UK, Dr. Ajayi weaves personal story and global insight into a rare reflection on what happens after the delivery room.

She doesn’t just ask what care we deserve. She asks what care we’ve never been taught to expect.

She shares:

• Pelvic floor dysfunction, identity shifts, and global disparities in postpartum care

• Cultural traditions that hold us (like Nigeria’s omugwo) and Western systems that often don’t

• How to protect your identity after birth—and why that work is still yours, even years later

• Boundaries, grief, and the quiet work of nourishing yourself after motherhood begins

This isn’t about going back to who you were. It’s about meeting who you’ve become—with more language, more grace, and more support than you were ever offered before.

*This is a special National Black Girl Month™ feature by Dr. Phoebe Ajayi originally airing on www.youtube.com/@nationalblackgirlmonth 

Access the free toolkit at NationalBlackGirlMonth.com
Connect with Dr. Ajayi at phoebeajayi.com
Connect with Dr. Rikesha Fry Brown at www.instagram.com/dr.rikesha
Connect with Felicia Ford at www.threads.net/@friendscallmefe
Join Momentum Lab: https://lab.feliciafordandco.com

More about Dr. Ajayi:
Dr Phoebe Ajayi is an NHS GP with experience across numerous specialities, here in the UK and her home country, Nigeria. She took a professional interest in postpartum rehabilitation and maternal health after a difficult first pregnancy and labour experience in 2017. Her desire is that all women are well supported during and after pregnancy. She achieves this by educating healthcare professionals and the public, influencing policy, and consulting with companies who have the same goal. For her work in this area, she received an award from the Royal College of General Practitioners. She is a published author; her book "After Birth: Postpartum Recovery of the Body and Mind" is available on Amazon and at all major book distributors. Outside of work, Phoebe enjoys crocheting, exercise and a good novel.