EP09: Mary McDirmid: Grief Is a Companion of Mine

2025-06-06

Trigger warning: This episode includes discussion of suicide and may be difficult for some listeners. Grief doesn’t follow a schedule, and when it crashes into family dynamics, legal paperwork, and financial loose ends, it can leave you reeling. Justin Weidenfeld sits down with Mary McDirmid, who shares what it was like to lose her brother to suicide and suddenly become the one in charge of sorting it all out. From managing estate logistics to telling her young children the news, Mary speaks honestly about the weight of res...

Trigger warning: This episode includes discussion of suicide and may be difficult for some listeners.

Grief doesn’t follow a schedule, and when it crashes into family dynamics, legal paperwork, and financial loose ends, it can leave you reeling.

Justin Weidenfeld sits down with Mary McDirmid, who shares what it was like to lose her brother to suicide and suddenly become the one in charge of sorting it all out. From managing estate logistics to telling her young children the news, Mary speaks honestly about the weight of responsibility, the sting of unfinished conversations, and the moments when everyday tasks, like buying eggs, felt impossible.

How do you keep functioning when you’re barely holding it together? Who do you turn to when you’re expected to be the strong one? Mary offers a clear answer: you build a support system that actually works. For her, that meant leaning on her counselor, showing up for sessions with her trainer, and giving herself permission to take care of her own emotional health. She also shares the three questions she believes every adult child should ask their parents while there’s still time to plan.

Justin and Mary’s conversation is a reminder that self-care isn’t optional when you’re grieving, and that having honest conversations now can spare your loved ones a lot of heartache later.

Episode Breakdown:

00:00 Introduction to Grief and Money

01:02 Mary’s Grief Journey

03:46 Coping with Suicide and Sudden Loss

07:10 Talking to Kids About Death

12:49 Everyday Life After Loss

24:10 The Burden of Responsibility

29:12 Managing an Estate Without a Plan

35:12 Legal Complications of Unmarried Partnerships

42:30 What Not to Say to Someone Grieving

45:18 Building a Support System

52:53 The Fragility of Life