Someone had a pretty-rotten-no-good-awful moment with a cop. That someone was a guy named Martin Hyde. If you don't know Martin Hyde, you are dumb. Martin Hyde is a really important super big shot deal and everyone who doesn't know that is just stupid. He's friends with all the super powerful and important people in Sarasota, Florida (so yes, this is a "Florida Man" story) and everyone knows to respect Martin Hyde and treat him like the god-man he is. So when Martin Hyde was driving at 57 miles an hou...
Someone had a pretty-rotten-no-good-awful moment with a cop. That someone was a guy named Martin Hyde. If you don't know Martin Hyde, you are dumb. Martin Hyde is a really important super big shot deal and everyone who doesn't know that is just stupid. He's friends with all the super powerful and important people in Sarasota, Florida (so yes, this is a "Florida Man" story) and everyone knows to respect Martin Hyde and treat him like the god-man he is. So when Martin Hyde was driving at 57 miles an hour in a 40 mph zone and texting while driving...well, Martin Hyde attracted the attention of a woman who was just doing her job. That woman happened to be a police officer, and she pulled him over for speeding and texting, in short, breaking the law.
Martin Hyde may have broken the law, but she broke Martin Hyde's brain because never in the history of ever had he, Martin Hyde, ever been treated with such disrespect. The police officer was wearing her body cam, and Martin Hyde was recorded having a very Martin Hyde moment in the middle of the street. Threatening legal action, her job, her livelihood, and most important of all - letting her know she had disrespected him.
Fortunately for the world, and unfortunately for Martin Hyde, the body cam footage was released and the rotten moment went viral. Within a few days, the video crashed his hopes of becoming a Congressman. He decided to say sorry and apologized for the following:
Insulting a police officer while on duty
Threatening a police officer with the loss of her job for daring to stop him and issue a citation
Calling her supervisor ("I know him personally!") to report her
Asking a police officer if her nationality had anything to do with how awful she was
Being Australian
But it's all OK because Australia has issued a formal apology to the world for producing Martin Hyde, former congressional candidate. But all is not lost for Martin Hyde, deserver of respect, for he is this week's apology on Peach Glen PA's least favorite podcast (and now Martin Hyde's least favorite podcast as well)! We could not be more proud.
As rotten and bad as his day was, it did lead to perhaps the most amazing written apology-PR letter we've had the pleasure to read, and with all due respect to Martin Hyde's campaign team: Bully for you for producing such a fan-f***ing-tastic piece of text book perfect work.
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