S11 Ep. 9 Breaking Free from Pornography: A Son’s Journey to Healing and Redemption

Join The Graceful Warrior Podcast as host Monica Hansen and her son Matthew Edwards courageously discuss his struggle with pornography addiction, starting in middle school. Explore how faith, prayer, and God’s guidance helped Matthew overcome temptation, heal from a broken father-son relationship, and find true fulfillment.

This episode is perfect for those who want to tackle sensitive topics like lust, shame, and the power of redemption, offering hope and practical advice for parents and young adults.

 

Connection Corner- Matthew Edwards- Instagram @matthew_.e1

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 Here are practical parental involvement strategies to help protect children from harmful influences like pornography and support their emotional and spiritual growth:

1. Active Engagement in Your Child’s Life

• Monitor Media and Device Use: Regularly check what your child is accessing on phones, gaming devices, or computers. As Monica emphasized, “The eyes are the window to the soul.” Set clear boundaries and use parental control tools to filter content.
• Know Their Friends: Understand who your child is spending time with, as peer influence can introduce harmful content (e.g., Matthew was exposed to pornography via a friend’s PSP at school). Attend school events or meet their friends’ parents to stay informed.
• Be Present at School: Get involved in school activities or parent-teacher organizations to stay aware of the environment and potential risks, like the incident Matthew described on school grounds.

2. Open Communication and Trust-Building

• Create a Safe Space for Dialogue: Encourage honest conversations without judgment. Matthew struggled to open up about his addiction due to shame, but his eventual transparency in a youth group setting was pivotal. Ask open-ended questions like, “What’s something new you’ve come across online?”
• Discuss Sensitive Topics Early: Address issues like pornography, temptation, and healthy relationships before they encounter them. Monica noted the statistic that 15% of teens see pornography by age 10, highlighting the need for early education.
• Model Vulnerability: Share age-appropriate personal stories or struggles to show it’s okay to be open, as Monica did by facilitating Matthew’s story on the podcast.

3. Spiritual Guidance and Reinforcement

• Incorporate Faith-Based Values: Use biblical teachings or spiritual principles to guide discussions about temptation and sin. Matthew referenced stories like Jesus’ temptation in the wilderness and Samson’s fall to lust, which helped him stay grounded.
• Pray with and for Your Child: Monica emphasized prayer as a “weapon” (referencing Ephesians 6 and the story of Jericho). Pray together to strengthen your child’s faith and resilience against temptation.
• Encourage Church Involvement: Support participation in youth groups or faith-based communities where kids can find positive role models and accountability, as Matthew did when he spoke up in his youth group.

4. Address Emotional Voids

• Recognize Underlying Issues: Matthew’s struggle with pornography was tied to the absence of his father, highlighting the need to identify and address emotional gaps. Spend quality time with your child to build a strong bond and reduce the need to seek fulfillment elsewhere.
• Seek Positive Role Models: If a parent is absent or uninvolved, connect your child with mentors (e.g., coaches, pastors, or family members) who can provide guidance and support.
• Validate Their Feelings: Acknowledge your child’s pain or struggles, as Monica did with Matthew’s hurt from his father’s absence, to help them process emotions healthily.

5. Set Boundaries and Teach Accountability

• Establish House Rules: Monica noted that her home was “somewhat strict,” but rules like no inappropriate content were crucial. Clearly define what’s acceptable and enforce consequences consistently.
• Teach Self-Reflection: Encourage your child to understand their “why,” as Matthew did when identifying his reasons for turning to pornography. Help them reflect on triggers and healthier coping mechanisms.
• Promote Accountability: Suggest accountability partners or groups, like Matthew’s youth group, where kids can share struggles and support each other.

6. Stay Proactive and Vigilant

• Educate Yourself on Trends: Stay informed about platforms like TikTok or devices like PSPs (as mentioned by Matthew) that kids use to access content. Research apps and games to understand potential risks.
• Regular Check-Ins: Routinely ask about their day, online activities, or challenges. Monica was unaware of Matthew’s exposure initially, underscoring the need for consistent check-ins.
• Balance Freedom and Oversight: Give age-appropriate independence but maintain oversight. Monica’s advice to not just hand over a phone or game without monitoring resonates here.

Implementation Tips:

• Start Early: Begin conversations about media, temptation, and faith as young as 8–10, given early exposure stats (15% of teens see pornography by age 10).
• Use Resources: Leverage Christian or parenting resources (e.g., books, podcasts like The Graceful Warrior, or apps) to guide discussions on sensitive topics.
• Stay Consistent: Make involvement a daily habit, not a one-time effort. Matthew’s journey shows that ongoing support and prayer were key to his healing.

 #pornography addiction, #overcoming temptation, #Christian parenting, #healing from addiction, #faith-based recovery, #fatherless struggles, #spiritual growth, #Forgiveness.

 

 

 

Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. Ephesians 6:11