Dad’s Don’t Babysit, It’s Called Parenting!

OK warriors - let me know if this sounds familiar. You go out without your kids and see a friend. They say…”whose got the kids?” Meanwhile, your husband goes out with the kids, and he hears "Awe, it's so nice of you to babysit and give mom a break." Sigh.

Or you’re a mom who works outside the home and are frequently asked “How do you juggle it all?” Conversely, your husband, who also works outside the home is asked that question NEVER. Ever feel frustrated when dads get a pat on the back whenever they are out with the kids, while moms often get judged? (You know, the can’t you control that kid, or can’t you keep that kid quiet look!)? Then this is the episode for you!

This episode explores the deeply rooted gender bias and socialization that results in a “second shift” for moms working outside the home. Just as there is a wage gap between men and women in the workplace, there is a "leisure gap" between them at home. We’ll talk about how questions like can women (but not men) “have it all” not only makes it more difficult for working moms, but it also marginalizes fatherhood. We’ll detangle “having it all” versus being expected to DO it all.

We should all be outraged. Outraged by the low bar and the lower expectations which minimize the incredibly vital role fathers play. We must interrupt that gender biased default because it’s not good for women, it’s not good for men, and it’s not good for families. Being a dad is not a secondary role, it’s a primary one. It's not babysitting when a father spends time caring for his children, it's just called being a dad!

References:

https://www.thelily.com/my-husband-and-i-are-equal-partners-why-does-he-get-so-much-more-credit-for-parenting/

https://www.npr.org/2014/07/08/329804378/why-arent-men-asked-if-they-can-have-it-all

https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2019/06/12/fathers-day-facts/

https://www.scarymommy.com/dads-get-more-praise-doing-everyday-things

https://www.tlc.com/parenting/dads-are-happier-than-moms--study-says--but-its-not-that-simple

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