Criticism and Pain

 

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TONY BOLSTORF 

 

Criticism is an expression of pain.

 

We criticize because we feel like we have been hurt, taken advantage of or even abused and had no power to stop it or better yet it was out of our control. Now in return we still feel the slight of that pain and when someone strikes that nerve (i.e. they disagree with us, cut us down, criticize us, even offer a differing opinion) we feel the immediate need to strike back. 

 

Now there are a lot of directions to take this… but I am going to focus on this one thing… yeah we could talk about getting rid of your anger, your triggers etc… 

 

But here is the simple truth. When people criticize you they expect it in return. It is like the pay off for them. They feel empowered that you were incited to criticize back… So kill them with Kindness. This does not mean that you don’t share your honest opinion etc… but you do it in love. 

 

I have had many attacks on social media and I just love them back. I say “hey thanks for sharing, love that you read my posts, and don’t forget Jesus is crazy about you.

I have people attack me in public places for shirts I wear or for trying to share Jesus with people… I smile and say “hey its all good, I hope you have an amazing day and remember Jesus is crazy about you”. 

 

I have decided to not let criticism bring out the worst in me, but rather the best. 

 

What is criticism? it is judging the value of someones merits, or failures or differences… So why not just throw i wrench in it and love them back. 

 

Luke 6:32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. 34 And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. 35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

 

Notice earlier I said we could talk about getting rid of our anger etc… but this scripture doesn’t talk about that at all. It simply says love them back and we will be just like God the father. 

 

You know we try a lot of ways to get rid of anger and maybe the best way is to just let the love of God flow through us. My father in law was a plumber for years and he said no matter how dirty the pipes were…. the best way to clean them was to simply allow fresh water to flow through them. 

 

And on a side note, to be honest it’s great when people expect you to strike back and you simply love them back.