The One Who Left (Herself Behind)

Life pauses when heartbreaks occur - and then it doesn’t. It’s the nature of the beast that nothing stops. But momentum is often not a substitute for reparation. Time sutures wounds, but the scar is insubstitutable - and it often glows when we are lonely. And as memories tumble in, we tumble down. What comes as a rush are gestures and flourishes, the quirky and the infinitesimal, and the forgotten becomes unforgettable. We remember nothing huge but remember her hugely. For the fact is that people remain as traces, as the fine dust which settles on furniture and can clog our system without us being aware of it.

 

Nostalgia, thus, is more insidious than presence.

 

What is it about those who depart or leave us? Is love forever an interruption? Is it’s value always attached to departures and heartbreak? Is it the universe’s way of redeeming our lives but also punishing us for our non-attention when it might be needed the most? Is love’s exposition - as we see it in our peripheral vision - the one true measure of its bounty? The tiny unasked for gestures, the tea, the pat, the hug, the laugh. The light which comes from silence, the comfort which comes from presence.

 

We are engulfed in the generosity of people who we unrelentingly take for granted. And whose grace, tragically, lies unrequited till it is just too late.

 

No wonder, nostalgia is finally tragedy couched in a wistful smile.

 

If you liked this poem, consider listening to these other poems on leaving and staying -

• A City Made of Our Sighs
• Departures
• Distances: Kaifi Azmi Ke Liye

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Get in touch with me on uncutpoetrynow@gmail.com

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The details of the music used in this episode are as follows -

Music: Rising Sun by Sascha Ende
Free download: https://filmmusic.io/song/86-rising-sun
License (CC BY 4.0): https://filmmusic.io/standard-license
Artist website: https://www.sascha-ende.de