Spider-Man: No Way Home, or ”Dweeb Splooge”

It's the movie that finally got people back into the theaters after a global pandemic, a billion-dollar hype machine/feat of emotional manipulation that successfully weaponized our collective nostalgia by retrofitting two previous iterations of Marvel's flagship character into a snake sucking its own dick. Everything you once loved and found heart-wrenching pathos in will be reduced to fan service or lamp shaded to death with aloof ironic detachment. Digitally de-aged villains whose internal struggles can be cured with a homemade injection concocted with kitchen science. A once bustling metropolis filled with everyday citizens barren save for whatever extras can fit against a blue-screen. The entire multiverse fracturing under the weight of a wish to get into MIT. Great powers and great responsibilities in service of Kevin Feige's bank account, save for the cut Sony and Amy Pascal get to take home. The tragedy is that you don't realize what you're tasting is ash in your mouth because you've been convinced otherwise. 

You are not immune to popaganda. But we are.

Spider-Man: No Way Home

A special thanks to our $10 Executive Producers: Isaac, Porridge Fist, Walt Lewellyn of The Black Casebook, Tropical Doves, Jim, jprestonpoole, Sam, Lohik, bernventers, Owen2, and Ronnie Gardocki.

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Production by Miguel Tahni. Art by Zoe Woolley. Follow @MarvelousDeath for updates.