Supporting College Dreams Without Crushing Them: Helping Teens Build Realistic Admissions Goals

The college journey puts parents and counselors in a delicate position: walking the fine line between dream supporter and dream crusher. Join Cathy and Meredith in their post-Spring Break episode as they dive into how you can both encourage and champion your kids while helping them maintain a healthy degree of balance while crafting their dream school list. They unpack the difference between having a dream and being delusional about what the college admissions process is, how to balance goals and ambition with reality, the danger of dangling the carrot of a highly selective school in front of your children, and explore the reasons why trying (and applying to all the highly selective schools in the country) can be problematic! For all this, and as always, much more, be sure to tune in now! Thanks for listening!

Key Points From This Episode:

• [0:01:10] What we got up to for Spring Break 2025.
• [0:02:10] The topic of today’s episode: dream supporter vs dream crusher.
• [0:04:00] A common tightrope parents often have to walk.
• [0:05:30] Identifying schools with higher acceptance rates that still reflect the qualities and characteristics of your child’s top-choice, highly selective schools.
• [0:06:15] The difference between having a dream and being delusional about what the college admissions process truly is.
• [0:07:45] Unpacking what a “Dream School” is: balancing goals and ambition with reality.
• [0:08:50] The danger of using highly selective colleges as a carrot for students to work hard.
• [0:09:30] Why the “reality” part of college admissions is hard for parents.
• [0:12:40] Parents displacing the dream-crushing conversation: when it’s okay and not.
• [0:17:00] Can you support the dream but also balance the fine line of reality?
• [0:18:40] Where, as a parent, are you willing to disappoint your child, and where are you not?
• [0:19:40] Encouraging your child to go after what they want with a healthy dose of balance.
• [0:21:00] What’s wrong with trying? (Applying to all the highly selective schools in the country.)
• [0:22:55] What supporting the dream does and does not mean (in our opinions).

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You

Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram