Are you exhausted and want to run away just to take care of yourself?
To have just a little bit of time and peace for yourself? And Valentine's Day is just the day to take that break and show yourself some love. Well, this episode is for you.
Love is in the air, it's February and you either love it or hate it. Valentine's Day may be a day you love to celebrate, and you are excited to give and receive candy and chocolates. Going out to a nice candlelit dinner in a dress that makes you feel your best, and spending it with the person or people you love, whether that is a significant other, friend, child, or yourself. Or you might hate it and the commercialization of love, the pressure to give the right gift, or just sadness that you maybe don’t have a significant other to celebrate with.
The new trend has been Galentines, where women celebrate with their best girlfriends or even a self-care day.
Now, I love love. Love is my thing, It is one of the most essential things for life. I think we, at times, misunderstand love though.
If I asked you how you love yourself, what would you say? I imagine you thinking of bubble baths and taking days off work to rest, getting yourself some flowers, treating yourself to a trip to the mall, getting a nice relaxing massage, or taking yourself to your favorite restaurant. I’m relaxed just thinking about it. Wouldn’t we all love a day full of such indulgence and relaxation, I know I would.
These are ways we can show ourselves love, however, these are just the tip of the iceberg, things we can do on the surface.
When we look deeper, self-love and self-care are these daily deeper, more intentional choices we make. They might not always be pretty or easy for that matter, but it will take you out of this yo-yo feeling of constantly feeling like you’re running on empty and these surface-level self-care things just not cutting it.
For a more permanent solution, try these... because true self-love requires us to sometimes do hard things and fight for ourselves.
Self-love requires honesty…
Self-love requires us to be honest about what we want and need. And not what we think we want or need or what we should want or need, but truly what helps us foster a sense of self-care and being taken care of. To take care of ourselves, we first need to look at what it is we need to take care of ourselves daily. That means being honest about when we’re tired and need to take a break, and when we are not able to show up emotionally and physically for others, and the people and things we need in our lives to feel supported and taken care of. What is it that you need?
Self-love requires us to set boundaries...
Self-love requires us to say no in order to honor what we want and need. To honor our energy, not run ourselves into the ground, and give away more than we have, we have to set boundaries. That means also being ok with disappointing others when we set our boundaries, say no, and put into action what truly takes care of us.
Self-love requires us to let others lend a hand...
Self-love acknowledges that things aren’t all on us. We don’t have to hold it all in or hold it together and do and be everything to everyone. To truly take care of ourselves requires us to take off the mask and ask for help, let others know that we can’t do it alone and need their help. This sometimes is the hardest part of self-care. In letting ourselves and our struggles fully be seen, by showing up and being real about our struggles, and leaning on others for support, it brings us closer to us and our needs being met.
With self-confidence coaching, these are the hard things I help my clients do every day. To have true self-care and self-love is an amazing feeling and a freedom that requires you to show up daily to support what you want and need.
Love is a choice that you make day to day in each choice and action you take. A choice to take care of you.
If you have a hard time showing yourself love, grace, and kindness, then self-confidence coaching or self-esteem or self-esteem counseling in Chicago (we’re also available online) may be the next step for you. You don’t have to solve this on your own. Book a complimentary session, during that session, I will help you see what may be getting in your way of building your confidence.
What has been the result of you not taking care of yourself? That may look like being overcommitted, being resentful in your relationships, this build-up of anger, feeling like you don’t matter, and feeling like you have the lower hand in your relationships. All things that don’t support self-care or self-love. I’d love to hear, simply comment or shoot me an email.
Happy Valentine's Day.. How will you show yourself some love this month?
