Pediatrician’s Guide to Preparing Parents for the College Transition

“I retired from my pediatric practice to make a broader impact on children's wellness,” says Dr. Hope Seidel, a seasoned pediatrician and parenting coach. “I strongly believe that wellness begins at home,” she asserts. Together with Dr. Polly Watson, they address the challenges parents face as their children transition to college and adulthood, offering insights on fostering independence and resilience in young adults.

 

Dr. Seidel focuses on critical issues affecting adolescent wellness, including the harmful effects of excessive academic and social pressures. She emphasizes the importance of self-efficacy, enabling young adults to tackle their own challenges, and equips them with essential life skills such as handling failure, being financially literate, and setting personal boundaries.

 

Dr. Watson and Dr. Seidel address questions from listeners and provide guidance on managing complex situations like co-parenting with a difficult ex-partner, urging parents to focus on being the healthiest version of oneself so that children can recognize the difference between healthy and unhealthy parenting. Dr. Seidel advocates for transparent conversations about college costs and the necessity for children to navigate their educational journeys independently, avoiding parental interference. 

 

This episode encourages parents to support their college-aged children by fostering autonomy and carefully considering their own motivations when communicating, to avoid imposing their emotional needs on their children.

 

Quotes

• “Change your narrative – that being a good parent is defined by other people in your life. We all get to decide what it means for us and we don't want to have our kids be accountable for our feelings of adequacy as parents. It's not their job to make us feel like good parents.” (04:55  | Dr. Hope Seidel)
• “When it comes to life skills, we grossly underestimate what our kids can do or should do. We pressure them to excel in this kind of hyper-competitive world, thinking that that's the way to success. Frankly, we're teaching them that's the way to success. Then we sometimes don't teach them the basic skills that truly fuel the capacity for self-efficacy. We interfere with their building blocks of feeling self-confident. Self-efficacy is the belief in your ability to complete your own tasks, to reach a goal, to be able to manage your own situations.” (06:54 | Dr. Hope Seidel) 
• “When I really feel sad, I look at my kids' life through their lens, of all that's possible, which is sometimes all that's ending. I can feel so much hope when I can look at it through what they have to look forward to. I would recommend you do that with your kids. Their life is full of possibility and excitement right now. We don't want to steal that from them while we're dealing with our own kind of emotional stuff as we figure this time out.” (49:57 | Dr. Hope Seidel)
• “Our kids are going to live different lives than ours if we're doing it right. They are going to learn to trust a compass that's their own, not ours. They are going to be exposed to things that they have to figure out how to navigate because we won't always be there. The better we get at providing them with that opportunity, with this soft place to land on the other side, the greater their capacity for success. (51:34 | Dr. Hope Seidel) 

 

Links

Connect with Dr. Hope Seidel:

Learn more about Dr. Seidel: www.parentwithhope.com

Website: https://hormonewellnessmd.com/podcast

Resources: https://hormonewellnessmd.com/podcast-resources

 

Connect with Dr. Polly Watson:

Website: https://hormonewellnessmd.com/podcast

Resources: https://hormonewellnessmd.com/podcast-resources

 

Disclaimer: https://hormonewellnessmd.com/podcast#Disclaimer

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