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Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”
Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”
Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”
Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“
Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
[00:00:00] <music>
Laura Dugger: Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.
[00:00:17] <music>
Laura Dugger: Today's message is not intended for little ears. We'll be discussing some adult themes and I want you to be aware before you listen to this message.
Today's message is brought to you by Chick-fil-A East Peoria. Stay tuned for insider tips we're going to share during the episode.
We have appreciated all your positive feedback, especially on these episodes where we've featured various Christian sex therapists. We're going to do our best to keep interviewing more experts in this field. So definitely reach out to us if you have a particular person or topic in mind that you want to hear covered at The Savvy Sauce. Our general email address is the best place to reach us, and it's simply info@thesavvysauce.com.
Due to the popularity of all those previous episodes, we are bringing on another Christian sex therapist today, Vickie George. I had the privilege of being supervised by Vickie while I was studying marriage and family therapy. Today the two of us are going to be discussing how to understand each gender a little bit better to enhance our enjoyment of the special relationships in our lives. [00:01:32] I am so very happy to get to share her with you today.
Hello, Vickie.
Vickie George: Hi, Laura.
Laura Dugger: So glad to have you. It's great to join you today in your cozy office as we record near Atlanta, Georgia. Can you just start us off by giving us a brief snapshot of your life?
Vickie George: Well, I was born a missionary kid for two years, my parents in Italy. But my father was in the ministry, worked with Billy Graham Association and also the Navigators. So, in essence, in many ways, I'm a preacher's kid.
I was kind of called and felt the desire to be a therapist even at 13 years of age. So, I took everything in high school and college, and grad school that I could, and I've been a therapist for 35 years. I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist, licensed professional counselor, and also, a certified sex therapist, which I adore being all of the above.
Laura Dugger: And you are phenomenal at those. During my time in Atlanta, I very much enjoyed you as one of my supervisors. [00:02:39] So, I've always appreciated our special relationship.
Vickie George: Well, good, because that is also one of the things that I am as a supervisor, and it's 30% of my practice. I adore being a supervisor and mentoring the next generation of therapists, marriage and family therapists, sex therapists, because there's such a great need for that across all ages, cultures, socioeconomic status in our country.
Laura Dugger: You have a unique perspective. Do you mind just sharing ways that your faith intersects with your work?
Vickie George: Well, I went to an integrative program for graduate school and so essentially have a degree in both psychology, counseling, and also in theology. So the marriage of those two together is my background. And that is what I bring into the counseling room, either directly or indirectly, depending on what my clients' needs are, what their desires are, how much they want that to be a part of it. [00:03:43]
So if they need me to not talk about that, I can. And if they are needing the biblical counselor who can back up everything with what I'm saying, from scripture and biblical principles, I can do that too. And I can do it indirectly in the gospel, paraphrased according to Vickie George, to bring it into the room if I need to.
Laura Dugger: Brings a lot of clarity. You often see a lot of males in your practice, and it seems that they feel safe opening up to you. Why do you think that is?
Vickie George: I have always gotten along really well with males. My personality lends itself to quote-unquote some more traditionally male characteristics than just female. And so I think that also that I was gifted in that way besides my personality which of course we have from birth, so I'm claiming that fully. [00:04:42]
My husband was a cop and also an athlete so I learned about men firsthand and from man's man. And just so often in our society now, it's troublesome being a male because we have swung as we've needed to from it was such a patriarchal society and allowing now for understanding more about women, etc., which is great and we've needed it.
Well, anytime you swing from one extreme to the other, because that's how change takes place, then males have kind of gotten a bum rap and not understood. Everybody's trying to understand women, which we need, of course, but they have not really tried to understand males and where do they come from, what makes them tick, et cetera.
So I wanted to know about that because I wanted to understand 50% of the population, especially that came into my practice, and so that I could connect with them and they would feel comfortable being in counseling, which is a hard gig for men anyway. The fact that they would feel understood by a female counselor was one of my goals, and I was on mission to make sure I learned how to do that well. [00:06:08]
Laura Dugger: Love it. How did you learn how to do that well?
Vickie George: I started doing research and trying to get inside their minds and what is important to them and what's not and just the things that were so surprising that women do not think about or know. For instance, for males who want to take care of their family, especially financially, money is always running in the background. Always. Always.
And so they will work more, especially as their family may grow, which then the wife so often, especially if she doesn't work outside the home, gets really frustrated because "you don't spend time with the family. We want you to be here more." Well, what he's doing is working more and harder so he can be providing for the family. So that is his way of trying to do family better that's misunderstood so often. That's just one example. [00:07:08]
Another thing is that for most men, they view the family and their relationships as important, but work will be number one, because they are the ones who feel that responsibility for the most part. Now, I'm making some generalizations, of course. And then relationships will be second.
Well, so often what we find in the way women are hardwired is that they will be first relationship and if they work outside the home, then that is going to be secondary to them. It's a part of who they are. It's not the whole of who they are.
Well, if you think about that, work is number one and relationships are number two for men. For women, so often relationships are one and work would be second. But the thing here is we're not so far apart because they're still in the top two.
Laura Dugger: And so maybe we have more in common than we would think.
Vickie George: Yes. Yes, we do. And so the more that you try to understand, seek first to understand and then be understood. That's the way. [00:08:17] Getting inside what makes your spouse tick. And what is important to them? What do they value? Because, of course, 70% of the fights that couples have are usually the same ones over and over again. And that's because we're dealing with gender differences, personality style differences, and values differences.
Values, for most couples, their morals are generally along the same line. And values can be, too. But, for instance, My husband valued baseball way more than I did, okay? So, once again, even if it's a value of what a hobby may be or something along that line, it's not a bad thing or a wrong thing. It's just what did they value more? For instance, a lot of males will value sports more than what a woman would.
Laura Dugger: So taking that example, if that is a fight that you see in your office where the husband values sports a lot more and the wife doesn't as much, how do you begin to work with that to get them to celebrate that difference rather than resent it? [00:09:30]
Vickie George: That's a good word of "how do we celebrate?". And I just say, viva la difference, because we complement each other. If we view the differences as a way to make a great team and to utilize those strengths or differences, etc. Like in a work setting, what makes a good team is not everybody being homogeneous. It's that they have different talents and so that makes up a good team in the business world. Anybody knows that in the business world.
So why would marriage be any different? And the fact that God created it that way. Sometimes people will say, well, it feels like God's cruel joke. Well, it's not. It is a way to complement us and to grow us and mature us and to make us better people.
Laura Dugger: You even mentioned that some of your personality traits you relate more masculine side. Could you share a few ways? Because maybe some people listening today are relating to that. [00:10:30]
Vickie George: Generally speaking, males will be more direct in how they approach things and women a little more indirect. And that comes in many varieties in how they approach life. I am a very much more of an involved therapist and pretty direct. I work a lot with highly conflictual couples. I work a lot with addiction. So those populations require more of a directness and involvement with them, and so that traditionally is more male.
Women will be a little more soft-peddled in how they may come across about something. If you are watching a group of men, they can be pretty direct and gruff about how something is. Women in a group will not be that direct or gruff.
Laura Dugger: Okay. You also mentioned when you wanted to understand males more, you did some research. [00:11:39] Do you have any books that you would recommend or anything that helped you get inside their minds?
Vickie George: Yes. Shaunti Feldhahn did a great book for both men and women. For instance, men are more visual. One of the stories she said that a man may notice a female in Home Depot, but even if they only saw her a split second, she still may be in his mind because he knows she's still in the store. Okay, well that does not register with a woman at all. That is literally a brain difference, gender difference between men and women.
So women do not understand in our culture that is so sexually saturated the complete 24-7 assault on males with visual images that they have to fight. It's on every billboard, one click on your computer, with porn, etc. So, you know, the everyman's battle, there is truth to that. And women do not understand the nature of how impactful and how ongoing continuously that is.
The other thing is women are more collaborative. Men are more competitive. The world of men is competition 24-7. There is never a break for men. It's who's the top dog. You can't show weakness, that's deadly in the world of men. Even among athletes, if one of them is hurt, the rest of the men will start distancing from them on the team in professional sports because it's almost like they're afraid of it impacting them or almost like we used to say when we were younger, cooties, getting on them or something so that they would not be able to perform as well. [00:13:32] So that's something that women don't think about and do, that there is never a break for men.
Laura Dugger: That kind of leads me into another question because we do have a lot of female listeners. So how do you recommend that they apply this information in order to enjoy their relationship more with the man in their life?
Vickie George: Well, one, just acknowledging that that is a thing for men and that we don't experience that and how much energy that must take. And appreciating of how they still try to do that, for instance, in the work world so that they are successful, so that then they can bring home the bacon and take care of their families. And so just appreciating.
I know how hard it is out there, and you're beat up by the world every day when you go to work. I just want you to know how grateful I am that you do that.
Laura Dugger: So expressing gratitude, just saying thank you, that could be a practical application today. [00:14:35]
Vickie George: Yes, yes.
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Well, you see a lot of couples. So what other gender differences do you see provoking conflict in couples?
Vickie George: How men and women usually communicate. Women are taught to express their feelings so much more culturally. [00:15:34] Men are not. Once again, that's viewed as a weakness. They're not socialized that way. They know three things. I feel good. I feel bad. I feel angry.
So, helping them understand what may be under those or expanding that in a very respectful way. Plenty of women have heard enough about respecting their husbands, etc. And if you want to know why all of a sudden he seemed fine and now he feels like he is totally enraged about something, very often is that he has felt disrespected in a way that a woman may not even be aware of.
For instance, women ask questions. That's how they connect to get information. So, how's this? Or what's going on with this? Or what are you going to do? Or blah, blah, blah. That's women. For men, they don't ask questions. That's why people laugh. You didn't ask about their life and their kids and blah, blah, blah. You play golf for four hours? No, they don't because men bond around an activity, women usually around something around talking. That's a difference right there. [00:16:43]
So, then when women ask men a lot of questions, then they feel like they are being put on trial or that they are not man enough to take care of business and you're having to drill them for information. So they will feel disrespected and that they are not man enough or you're not thinking that they are. That to women is like, are you kidding me? That's like a different universe. That has never entered my mind or never would enter my mind in a million years. That's the world of men.
Laura Dugger: That they can feel interrogated by those questions.
Vickie George: Yes, that's right. An interrogation of men when you are a wife never ever goes well.
Laura Dugger: So then if that is the conflict that you see, so that's a misunderstanding. Her motives were very pure and yet it came across as disrespectful. How would you start to work through that situation?
Vickie George: Well, one just letting women know that. And then they look at me with these big eyes and go, Well, then how do I ask a question? [00:17:56] How do I get information or whatever? Once again when you make things in the form of a statement, that you are pondering it or that you are wondering about it, we're thinking about it is a way to do it in respectfully so that they can think about it themselves and then come back in their timing.
Laura Dugger: I love it. So let's use an example of two different ways that a wife could ask something about her husband, maybe getting to the same bottom line question that she has, but a helpful way to ask it and a way that may come across as disrespectful. I'm kind of putting you on the spot here, but let's use an example of she wants to know, did you pick up groceries?
Vickie George: Yes. Groceries is a good one because I was just thinking about that. Have you ever had the experience where you've asked your husband to go to the grocery store to get something and they are very anxious? One, because they usually want to please you or do it right and that they are capable of picking up groceries for heaven's sake. [00:19:08]
So if you ask a lot of questions or they did it wrong or what have you... because men once again whatever they do they want to do it well or they don't want to do it at all. So if they view that you didn't think they did it well enough something as simple as the grocery store, then they're not ever want to go to go back again.
Now in our present era, I will make suggestions that can be helpful, like, whatever it is that you are wanting, do you have a picture of the label or the can or what have you so that he can take it to the grocery store to make sure that he gets the right one? Because you may have had texts or phone calls. Is it this? Is it this? You said, Pick up this. Well, there's 15 different types of varieties of this and then they're really frustrated just picking up, you know, canned tomatoes or whatever for chili or spaghetti. Does that make sense?
Laura Dugger: It totally makes sense. Because let's just say she had an expectation. She wanted this one, but didn't communicate it. And so when he comes home, why did you choose that brand of tomatoes?
Vickie George: Right.
Laura Dugger: Instead of...
Vickie George: "Oh, okay. Well, these tomatoes are great. I haven't used these before. I can either use them in this recipe or, you know, I'm going to save those for a different type of recipe and try out something else because I haven't used those before. [00:20:32] And for this one, actually, hmm, I'm sorry, I wasn't clear enough. I should have written out on the grocery list a little more clarification about what that was because there's 500 different varieties of tomatoes and brands and everything under the sun. So I will try to make sure that I'm a little more clear on that next time. So it's a way to still be respectful to them.
And sometimes women will think like, Oh, my goodness, that seems like a lot of work. Well, if you're going to learn how to do anything well that you don't know how to do, it's going to be work. Whether you're a female trying to learn about males, we're just talking about that, or husbands trying to learn about their wives and females, it goes both ways because we are different.
Laura Dugger: Totally, it will be difficult both sides. If anybody's feeling like, wow, we're putting the pressure on women, let's flip it and maybe give a practical example of how in a stereotypical gender difference situation. What are some practical things that the male can do that may seem hard, but honor, respect, or love his wife well? [00:21:42]
Vickie George: When she asks to connect, for instance, at the end of the day... this is another one that's kind of fun. A wife may ask, how was your day? Well, men will give the good or bad or whatever, or I don't want to talk about it, especially if it's they don't want to relive things. They want to move to the next thing. Like work is done, let me be home, relaxed or whatever the case may be.
For women, they want to talk about their day because that's a way to connect and the sharing. So they're looking for sharing from their husband and he's just wanting to answer the question and then move to the next thing, not to be disrespectful to her.
So if he can learn to give her at least three sentences and/or if it's something, "Honey, it was a tiring day, and I really don't want to relive it," that's what a lot of men will say, "I don't want to relive it again" for her to be able to respect that. But for him to give at least, well this kind of happened with the boss, just a paragraph as opposed to either not answering the question or giving one or two words. [00:22:58]
Most women will be, if you can give me three sentences to a paragraph, I will be okay. You know, instead of two pages that women will give to each other, is what I say, or men three words, can you find a middle ground of a paragraph?
Laura Dugger: That's good. And even it reminds me some of our friends who are married the husband has said it means a lot to his wife and so he will just jot down in his phone... throughout the day he'll just take a few notes of what he's doing so he remembers for that paragraph later.
Vickie George: This is where putting things in your notes to remind you. I have plenty of clients where the husband will be typing on his phone and he's not texting in session. Okay, because I won't allow that. But he is typing the notes so that he gets better at doing this and he can look at it as a reminder. [00:23:57]
Laura Dugger: I love that. It ties into what you mentioned earlier, which we need to remember, they want to please us and I believe we want to please them too. So when we can assume the best of each other, that helps. How can we embrace these differences in a positive way to draw closer to one another?
Vickie George: I really like trying to understand and get inside the head and the world of your spouse. The more that you make that and are intentional about that and learn about it, then you can start to value that. Once again, you have to be intentional about “this is what I'm doing,” and it's a way for us to connect and build a closer relationship. Because it's so natural for us to be all about ourselves, especially if we're stressed, because just life takes energy. So, it has to be an intentional thing that we do.
And then when you find out about what makes the other one tick and their inner world, then either expressing that, what you enjoy about that, or valuing it. For instance, with my husband and valuing baseball, and he played very competitive softball, and going to games. [00:25:18] And that was so enjoyable for him and being a part of the crowd that I could get in his world and that meant the world to him.
Okay, for me and music and theater and travel, that was really it for me. I remember him saying one time, my joy is watching your joy. That is really entering in to the world of the other that brings together a deep connection. It may not be your favorite thing. It may not be your thing at all. It's once again, what kind of an attitude do you have? It's important to you, so I'm going to value it because it's important to you.
Just like you do with your children, hopefully, that you wouldn't want to play Barbies for three hours, but of course your daughter does, or the tea party, so you're gonna play it for, you know, maybe 15 minutes, that kind of thing. It's not about us all the time, you know. It's not about me.
And I'm not talking about emptying yourself so that you have no sense of self, because that is not bringing health to any type of relationship. [00:26:33] It's both valuing you and me.
Laura Dugger: Oh, that's beautifully said. What are some things that you teach or discuss with your clients to help the couple start working better together?
Vickie George: Well, one is how they communicate because every couple that will call or want to come in for therapy says they have communication problems. Well, the communication problems, if you normalize and understand what gender differences are, okay, personality differences, I spend a lot of time. of what is their personality style and understanding that and what makes that particular personality tick. And when you understand that, then you either don't personalize it or you realize, Oh, that's them just being who they are with our personalities that we have from birth.
Some people are thinking types on how they make decisions on the world. Some people are feeling types of how they make decisions on the world. Some people are extroverts. Some people are introverts. Extroverts get energy from being with people. Introverts, it takes energy. Introverts only need one to three friends. Extroverts want lots of friends. [00:27:43]
Thinking types, they want to know and be able to give the reasoning on why they make something. Feeling types, they want it to feel right in their gut, what's important to them, and what they value. When you understand that, and bring those sorts of things together. Some like things more structured. They like to have a plan. Others like to leave things more open-ended.
You can find out a lot even on that one if you go on vacation. Some who want to have the whole vacation planned out. The other ones will, well, I don't know, we'll get there and then we'll just kind of see. Those types of things. Knowing that and not taking it personal or getting agitated or angry about it. How do we have both of that? I'd like a plan, you'd like to leave things more open. How can we bring the two of those together that is either a middle ground or meets the needs for both of us?
Laura Dugger: Okay, so I think I'm tracking with you. You're saying once you put language to that and you're on the same page, you're understanding each other's personality, then you can problem solve if there's a difference, okay, let's come together. [00:28:48]
Vickie George: Right. And if you view it as we're a team, that's different, but we're still a team. And how do we solve whatever the issue or the problem or what it is that we're trying to make a decision? If you view it outside of yourself or outside of the two of you, instead of we're trying to solve each other... no, that never works. That's what ends up in my office.
If we're on the same team and we're trying to solve, you know, A or B over here, so to speak, then it feels like a team and you come up with a solution. So you solve the solvable. The things that are not solvable are going to be... you're not going to change gender differences, you're not going to change someone's personality. So, that's an acceptance thing. It has to be an acceptance of the other for who they are and how they were created and born. [00:29:45] And if you don't, then you are trying to stamp out a sense of who that person is. And that's not healthy, that's not respecting, that's not godly in any form or fashion.
Laura Dugger: Let's take a quick break to hear a message from our sponsor.
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Laura Dugger: So what is one simple thing someone can do today to begin moving their relationship in a better direction?
Vickie George: Having an attitude of gratitude. We've heard this, but let's bring it down to something really practical. And it may sound kind of silly, but counting just three gratitudes in the morning when you're getting started. And brain research backs this up, that gratitude or positive is not our natural bent. More of the negative for protection is.
Because critical thinking is about survival. We're going to remember scary bear for survival versus beautiful daffodils. So our automatic response is, where's the bear? Watching for the bear for protection, survival, whatever. And so the brain is naturally hardwired that way. To hardwire it for more positive interaction, it has to be intentional and literally creating positive neural pathways.
So having an attitude of gratitude, meaning practical things that three things that you're grateful for in the morning and three things at night. Whether it's something that you have or that you're accomplished during the day or happened during the day, etc. [00:32:40] Those start to change the brain's neural pathways in a positive manner.
And of course, if you share those with your children, your spouse, friends, whoever it is, that just enables the positive neural pathway to gain more traction, so to speak.
Laura Dugger: What a cool challenge, if we all try this today, trying to look for the positive, you said having an attitude of gratitude, then if anything positive comes in our mind, challenging ourselves that we have to share it with that person and just watch what happens.
Vickie George: And sometimes you may have to dig really deep. When you are in a very dark, dark, you know, time period in your life, stress happens, you know, life on life's terms happens, that can be a really hard or heavy time. That you may have to dig deep for things.
At a time in my life that was a really tough time. I was like, I live in a country where I am not persecuted for my faith. I actually have food to eat and I am not enslaved like 27 million people in the world today and who may be persecuted to the point of death for their faith. [00:33:56] That's something to be grateful for that we have no clue about. That's a daily thing for other people in the world.
So, sometimes it's just being in our world and being grateful for, and sometimes it's actually having to get outside of our world to think in terms of gratitude.
Laura Dugger: To change your perspective.
Vickie George: To change your perspective.
Laura Dugger: And you're not talking about a light situation. Do you mind sharing with everyone what that season was that was particularly difficult for you?
Vickie George: One was when my husband years ago went through a transplant. And it was for a year. Literally, he could die at any moment. So that was an extremely stressful and dark time. He was very sick. Also, when I lost him two and a half years ago. And as a grieving widow that is a very dark time, and having to stretch really far for things that you are grateful for, when just grief itself, normal grief that happens in life and everybody has it at some point in life. [00:35:10]
Grief is a great stealer. It feels like fear. It creates anxiety. It creates things that may not have been a part of your world and you're wondering and you feel like you are completely ripped in half. Those types of things where you can't help but be self-absorbed because the pain is great. And so to think outside of that takes some intentionality. But remember, little glimmers of light in the darkness of the sky still show up.
Laura Dugger: Thank you for sharing. Switching gears here a little bit, I recommend counseling to pretty much everyone because I see so much value in the process and the outcome. So if a listener here is local today to Atlanta, Georgia, and they want to set up an appointment with you, how can they connect with you?
Vickie George: They can go to my website, vickiegeorge.com, pretty simple, and one, they can find out more about me and to see if I might be the one that would be helpful for them. If I'm not, then I have been in this business a long time and know a lot of great therapists that I can also usually make recommendations. I have my phone number on there so they can give me a call. [00:36:29]
I'm old fashioned in the way of since I am a marriage and family therapist and about relationship, I speak personally to anyone who calls for an appointment to answer their questions or speak to them directly so that if they come for counseling, we've already started some sort of connection and answering their questions or whatever the case may be that has a, quote-unquote, "personal touch".
Laura Dugger: That's great. We will definitely link over to your website in our show notes. So anybody wanting to connect with Vickie, learn more about her, definitely check out that website. We'll have it listed there.
As we conclude today, "savvy" means practical knowledge or discernment. So we would love to have some insight from your own life to inspire us with an action item that is practical and applicable. So what is your savvy sauce?
Vickie George: Well, I kind of talked a little bit about the savvy sauce being the attitude of gratitude. But in having an attitude of gratitude, that usually implies, from my perspective, a movement in hope or joy, or fun or laughter. [00:37:41]
So one of the things that also I say is laugh. Laugh often that changes the brain, it changes the environment that you're in. So, if you and your spouse can have a sense of humor and laugh at yourself, laugh at situations that may happen, but you realize you're going to get out of it and, oh my gosh, you know, we're in just a hot mess right now.
But if you can have a sense of humor. And I'm not talking about laughing at the other, that is not what I'm saying. But laughter is healing to the soul, changes the chemistry of the brain. So laugh and laugh often.
Laura Dugger: So good to end with today. Vickie, it's always energizing to chat with you. And if anybody spent time with you, they know that your laughter is contagious. So thank you for sharing so much with us today.
Vickie George: You are more than welcome. [00:38:41]
Laura Dugger: One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term "gospel" before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners and God is perfect and holy, so He cannot be in the presence of sin. Therefore, we're separated from Him.
This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior. But God loved us so much, He made a way for His only Son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute.
This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with Him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. [00:39:46]
We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us. Romans 10:9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.
So would you pray with me now? Heavenly, Father, thank You for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to You. Will You clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare You as Lord of their life? We trust You to work and change their lives now for eternity. In Jesus name, we pray, amen.
If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring Him for me, so me for Him, you get the opportunity to live your life for Him.
At this podcast, we are called Savvy for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So you're ready to get started? [00:40:48]
First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision my parents took me to Barnes and Noble to get the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. Start by reading the book of John.
Get connected locally, which basically means just tell someone who is part of the church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.
We want to celebrate with you too. So feel free to leave a comment for us if you made a decision for Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read Scripture that describes this process.
Finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, "In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.
If you've already received this good news, I pray that you have someone else to share it with today. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.
