The ReProgram

Secure Parenting with Tricia Wilson

This episode with Tricia Wilson, fellow facilitator of the Circle of Security Training, hits to the root of all we need to know as parents. Circle of Security is a simple, powerful way of understanding what children actually need from us. Essentially, it shows us that kids move out into the world to explore (the top of the circle), and then come back to us for comfort, connection, and regulation (the bottom of the circle). Our role is to be the “secure base” they can go out from, and the “safe haven” they can return to—watching over them, delighting in them, helping when needed, and welcoming them back when things feel hard. That’s it. Not perfection—just presence.I was introduced to this framework as a clinician when my children were small, and it organized my parenting and helped me streamline my energy to the place of the highest importance, I tell may anecdotes in the episode to illustrate what Circle of Security did for me (and my kids)!And this isn’t just a nice idea—it’s deeply rooted in decades of attachment research. From Bowlby’s early work on attachment, to Mary Ainsworth’s observations of how children organize around safety, to modern neuroscience showing how co-regulation literally shapes the developing nervous system—this model reflects what we know to be true: children thrive when they experience consistent, attuned, and repairing relationships. Security isn’t built through getting it right every time. It’s built through connection, rupture, and repair.Tricia is also a mother of 5, she birthed three boys who she parented the traditional high control/high punishment way, and then adopted two girls who had experiences attachment trauma, pushing her to find something that actually worked. Tricia is the author of the book "Adopting Grace; A Parenting Journey from Fear to Freedom," and she also has a prolific substack where she writes about family life, social justice and deconstructing from high control shame-based religion. You can find her work here: https://triciawilson.com/blog/Enjoy the episode!

Somatic Couples Therapy and the Call of These Times with Jordan Dann

What an important conversation with wise seasoned clinician, writer, and somatic couples therapist Jordan Dann we have for you today. Jordan illuminates how implicit attachment dynamics play out in couples (that alone is worth the listen!), we talk about the drama triangle (something that was so powerful for me to learn and work with in the last year), shifting from codependence to interdependence, and we really touch on and tackle this exact moment, where these dynamics are playing out on the national stage. She talks about "trauma porn," and this exact moment our society is in, witnessing heaps of harm without repair and what that does to our systems, and we both get teary talking about the human-to-human connection we can have in the streets, the post office, and how it feeds the field of humanity we're all swimming in. This was such an honor to speak with Jordan, and anyone struggling with their partner right now would so benefit from her work! She has a course for couples on her website here: https://jordandann.com/And her IG links all of her work, including her passionate wise Substack. Enjoy the episode!! 

Essential Ancestral Healing with Kathryn Blau

Ready for to exhale? My goodness, my ancestral healer Kathryn Blau is here to groundedly expand our awareness into the ancestral support available to us all, and my Lord we need it more than ever down here on this motherloving earth plane. Kathryn is a mama herself, and was trained by Dr. Daniel Foor, one of the leading experts in ancestral healing for personal and cultural transformation. I wanted to wait until I finished working with Kathryn and all four of my faily lines (you'll understand what that means soon) before recording with her, and offering her up to you all. And I'm so glad to finall have the space to tell you the many many magical healing stories of my work with her, and how this aspect of healing has been essential in my healing process and navigation of very challenging logistics in my personal life, especially in the past year. In times like these, we need all the assistance we can get, and our ancestors are dying (I couldn't help myself) to help!Ancestral Intervention y'all, that's the AI we're into. You can connect with Kathryn and her work here. So many of my friends and clients have worked with her (she offers individual and group work online) cannot recommend her enough! https://www.regenerate-healing.com/

Minnesota, Trauma, Nervous Systems & Reclaiming Agency with Kathleen Hoagland LPC

MN-born Kathleen Hoagland LPC has stepped in to meet the moment of the acute and collective trauma that is happening in Minnesota and to our country at the hands of ICE. In this conversation, Kathleen inspires and soothes us by explaining the therapeutic mutual-aid she has organized for the people of MN, she empowers and educates us on the various nervous system responses that are happening for all of us right now, and de-patholigizes all of it, she gives us micro-choices to land on in the midst of our stress responses to soothe our nervous systems and gradually start the process of moving us back into "Safe and Social," and we also talk about anger, agency and how to work with our body and old unconscious experiences in our own personal lives that might be coming up right now. We also talk about raising white boys at this moment, our own anger, our own complicity as white women, and what we are doing with those feelings as women. This is a good one y'all and I wanted to put it in your ear holes ASAP. Take care of yourselves, more soon. XOXO

Becoming Sane in an Insane World with Kristina Kyser, PhD

This conversation with Kristina Kyser, PhD (brilliant brave neurodivergent mother of three, former psycho-therapist turned somatic-spiritual educator), came at a moment when all of our nervous systems are feeling deeply rocked by what is happening in our country. It feels (increasingly) impossible to talk about “mental health,” “normalcy,” or “healing” without naming the water we are all swimming in, so we won’t. In this conversations, we talked about late-in-life neurodivergence many women are waking up to in mid-life, about why so many women feel like something is wrong with them when, in truth, something is deeply wrong with the systems we’ve been shaped inside of.Her statement that will stick with me: “Normal is a colonial spell.” We explored how the idea of “normal” was built inside patriarchal, colonial, productivity-obsessed systems that require disconnection to function. How those systems pathologize attunement, they medicalize grief, how they call regulation “compliance” and call sensitivity “disorder.”We talked about what it costs women (especially neurodivergent women), to live inside that distortion. How many of us were trained to mistrust our perception, to override our bodies, and to take responsibility for everything and everyone, while staying endlessly stuck in a cycle of self-improvement. We talked about trauma, spirituality, the inner child, ancestral memory, midlife awakenings, and the strange moment many women reach where the old strategies simply stop working.And how at its core, healing is not about becoming more tolerable to broken systems. It’s about becoming more loyal to ourselves.I deeply feel the tides shifting and we’re needing to answer the call to the Collective Care we always needed and deserved. In a time when truth is being distorted, bodies are being policed, and entire communities are being dehumanized, reclaiming our inner authority is not self-indulgent, it’s resistance, protection, and how we stay human. Enjoy the episode, I love us all so much!!You can access Kristina's incredible work here, including her Neurodivergent Rising Course and Community: https://www.kristinakyser.com/