Decoding Attachment Styles

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Why you keep picking the same fights. Why you feel so needy or so smothered. Let's talk about why your relationships play out the way they do, and what you can actually do about it.I’m your host, Annalisa Bahadur. I have a psychology degree, I’m a coach, and most importantly, I’ve been in the trenches. I used to have major anxious attachment. I know what it's like to feel that constant anxiety, to need reassurance, to feel like the relationship is always on the brink of collapse.But I did the work to move toward secure. And I’m now almost five years into a happy, stable relationship with a recovering avoidant. I’m not talking theory from a textbook. I’m talking about what actually worked for me and my clients.This podcast is about attachment theory, stripped down to the basics. No fluff, no fancy language. Just straight talk about how your early wiring affects your adult relationships.In each episode, we break down the four attachment styles - Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Fearful-Avoidant. We'll look at how they show up in your dating life, your friendships, and even at work. You'll hear real stories and get practical steps you can use right now.We focus on two main tools: empathy and boundaries.Empathy to understand why you and the people you love act the way they do.Boundaries to protect your own energy and stop cycles of drama and hurt.This isn't about blaming your parents or your exes. It's about giving you a roadmap to better relationships. You'll learn how to identify your patterns, communicate what you really need, and build connections that feel solid, not stressful.If you're tired of the same old problems and you're ready for real change, you're in the right place.Bonus- every Thursday you'll have a chance to listen in on real people as they share their struggles as I coach them through their challenges. Each individual has agreed to have these session recorded using a pseudonym, and aired for your benefit.

Episode List

How Secure Attached Breakup with Avoidant

Mar 15th, 2026 6:00 PM

Secure attached people don't beg or chase when an avoidant wants to breakup. They also know when to call it quits...and in this episode - that is what we are discussing. We will discuss...- a secure attached timeline to a deciding a breakup, - how they communicate breaking up- what they heal during breakup- how they respond when avoidant circles back 🚶🏻‍♂️‍➡️Follow me on instagram for more insights into attachment styles. 🔁 Share with someone who needs to hear this. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show

What Avoidant Do During And After Breakups

Feb 18th, 2026 3:00 PM

They act like they are over you the moment you breakup and that is crushing. But is that what they really feel? There are lot of "experts" on what avoidant attached person feel during breakups. I have on average 70 avoidant attached people on speed dial and I am sharing what they all say they go through during breakups. It's astounding how they all have the same breakup story. Leave a comment and let me know your thoughts on this podcast. Much love, AnnalisaI would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show

What to Look For In The First 90 Days Of Dating

Feb 2nd, 2026 3:00 PM

I wish someone had told me this when I first started dating. I made so many mistakes that landed me in some questionable relationships. The tips I share here has helped me choose a partner I enjoy life with. I'm breaking down the red flags to look out for, the green ones to pay attention to, the pace to move at so you don't end up with someone who blindsides you. This would help if you've been dating someone for a while or if you're now getting into the dating work. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show

Long Distance Romance With Avoidant Attached

Jan 29th, 2026 11:00 PM

What happens when you've been in a long distance romance with an avoidant attached person and it feels intense even if you've just met a handful of times? You want answers...What is happening here? Can this be anything more? Why do they ghost me and return? As Sarah shares her stories, we try to find her answers that would soothe her troubles heart. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show

How To Move On After Being Blindsided - Pre-recorded Session

Jan 23rd, 2026 1:00 AM

What happens when you have been friends for what seems like forever - you lose each other and find each other and in your older years decide to date but then to be blindsided by the avoidants pull away???Sarah shares her journey through friendship to falling in love with her friend and then the heartbreaking pulling away that started a journey into examining her anxious attachment style and healing. This is for you if you've ever been confused about your relationship going great and then suddenly coming to a halt. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show

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