Maybe Baby (private feed for josuekvolz@gmail.com)

#237: Blame it on the beauty industry

Hey!Last week I wrote about personal and political scapegoats and the heaven/hell of having something to blame all your problems on. The original inspiration for that essay was, randomly, a recent experience I had taking a new license photo, which had me thinking about the beauty industry in a new way, as a kind of scapegoat industrial complex. In the end, I didn’t mention beauty in the essay because it felt like a whole separate topic, one I’d rather explore in conversation. So I invited beauty critic Jessica DeFino on the podcast to discuss it.Jessica writes FLESH WORLD and is, to me, a consistently steadying voice in the headache of modern beauty discourse. I asked her to help me explore the idea of scapegoating in beauty and naturally this lead us all over the place, from the classic cosmetic procedure debate (a mini version of which took place in my podcast comments a couple weeks ago) to our own beauty scapegoats. I hope we were delicate enough with our language to avoid making anyone feel attacked! I think and hope we all have the same goals and are just trying to collectively figure out a humane way forward. (If you missed Jessica’s first appearance on my podcast, you can find it here.) (Also shout out to my episode with the GOAT Barry Schwartz, who I mention in this ep.)If you’re a free sub, welcome to the podcast! The episodes normally run on Wednesdays for my paid subs only, but I’m sharing today’s with everyone as a kind of part 2 to last week’s essay. You can listen through Substack (the site, the app) or your favorite podcast app by clicking the “Listen via…” button underneath the podcast player above.Also, trust I tell the (stupid) license story in detail, and on account of my journalistic integrity, have provided the photos below…Thanks for listening,Haleyp.s. ICYMI:-Lots of good discussion/analysis about Hannah Horvath and Fleabag in the discussion thread comments last Wednesday.-So many good recs for movies to watch with your kids (that don’t suck) under 15 things last week. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit haleynahman.substack.com/subscribe

🎧Dear Danny: Decoding the love-bomber

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit haleynahman.substack.comHello and welcome back to Dear Danny!Today we’ll be discussing the ethical boundaries of “boys night,” who should foot the bill on a date, the complexities of addiction inside a relationship, the reason men love-bomb (from a love-bomber himself), how to handle a relative falling for a romance scam, and a bachelor trip gone sus. Reallllly good questions everyone. We love you so much.Also, if you’re reading this as a free subscriber, the free Q&A this round is the ethical boundaries of boys night (a civilized 20-minute episode).Thanks for listening!Haley

🎧Dear Danny: The in-law episode

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit haleynahman.substack.comHey!It’s mid-month which means it’s time for Danny and me to answer your burning questions. So hard to choose. This round we picked six: On navigating PMS-inspired fights (when you don’t want your feelings invalidated but also know you’re being a little cuckoo), how to have a serious reckoning with some difficult in-laws, how to be less depressed in the…

🎧Dear Danny: Can I innocently cheat?

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit haleynahman.substack.comHi!Welcome back to Dear Danny. Today we’ve got NINE questions to answer: on “innocent” cheating, a boyfriend with a coke habit, a clingy coworker, a 12-year relationship that’s never felt exactly right, a friends-to-lovers arc, three separate questions on sex-troubled relationships, and a regretful ex-boyfriend. So much to cover so little time! Thank yo…

🎧Dear Danny: Should I end my relationship?

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit haleynahman.substack.comHey!Welcome back to Dear Danny. Today we’ve got: an anxious husband, a bad kisser, a two-year breakup pattern, a move-in crisis, a narcissistic brother, a boring relationship, and the mystery of love! I already published the introduction to this episode on the 3rd, so we’re going to be diving straight in. I apologize for the diarrhea story—was ultimately a non sequitur.Thanks for listening,Haleyp.s. If you’re a free subscriber, you’re seeing this because I’ve shared one Q&A (bad kisser) with you today in lieu of an essay, similar to how I share one free Q&A every month of my advice column, Dear Baby. Hope you enjoy!