The Beaverton Weekly Report

National Buffoon's European Vacation

Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre, Clare Blackwood and Nile Seguin) detail what Trump's EU deal means for Canada, break down the bombshell news that Canada is still sending arms to Israel and discuss why it doesn't feel like housing is getting any cheaper even as prices fall. Then the Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz discovers the worst place you can inject yourself with Botox.  If you'd like an extended cut version that dives into the Chris Feucht "scandal" check us out on Patreon.

Our government is at the cottage

"Break out the Caesars Carney!" Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre and Craig Fay) talk the government's attempt to consult with Indigenous Peoples about Bill C-5 after the fact, wonder what a trade deal with Trump would even look like at this point, and break down just how pathetically weak Canada's latest statement on Gaza is. Then The Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz reveals the most direct way to stop your son from eloping with his girlfriend.  If you'd like an extended cut version that also talks about the Poilievre by-election and the Longest Ballot Initiative, check us out on Patreon.

Go West, Young Pierre

"In Alberta, your future lies." Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre, Clare Blackwood and Megan MacKay) speculate about what strategies Poilievre can use to win his by-election, break down Danielle Smith's over the top list of demands for constitutional amendments, and delight in the Maga world's meltdown over Trump's refusal to release the Epstein list. Then the Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz finds a new, ornothological way to win the U.S. Trade War.  If you'd like an extended version of this episode that also talks about the Twitter AI's racist breakdown and the future of AI in Canada, check us out on Patreon.

Spending Cut Carn(ey)age

"Slash and burn, Carney style!" Luke and the Panel (Nile Séguin and Clare Blackwood) break down Mark Carney enacting spending cuts that even Harper wouldn't dream of, and then dive into the biggest sports stories going on in the world: The Blue Jays are soaring, Rogers is screwing over the Raptors, and the Mitch Marner saga makes us wonder how hockey players can be the toughest athletes in sports if they're afraid to answer media questions? Then the Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz discovers the best way to get out of a traffic stop.  If you would like an extended cut version of this episode that dives into the latest developments in the Epstein story, check us out on Patreon.

The Beaverton Weekly Report: Canada Day Spectacular!!!

Canada turns 158! Ian and the Panel (Nile Séguin, plus special guests Andrew Ivimey and Diana McCallum) discuss how that “elbows up” thing is working for Mark Carney, some of our favourite things about this country, and invent a new Canadian accent. Then the Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz reveals who or what the Baronet of Nova Scotia is. If you would like an extended cut version of this episode that dives into the latest breaking news of Confederation in 1867, check us out on Patreon.