Really Useful Conversations

Protecting midlife women from suicidal thoughts - factors that help

In the last episode, recorded for World Suicide Prevention Day, I spoke specifically about the risk of suicidal thoughts and behaviours for midlife women, given the statistics show that the most female deaths by suicide tend to occur in midlife. I promised that I would follow up to talk about how when navigating perimenopause we might be at more risk and more importantly, what we might do to keep ourselves safe.  As a qualified suicide intervention tutor I am aware of evidence based research which shows protective factors that can help - basically the things we can do for ourselves, and others, to help keep them safe from the Edge of Enough. Life happens and events can cause us to wobble, we probably cannot do a lot about that, but there are things that we CAN do to help us stay safe, and I am talking about them in this episode. Navigating this chapter of menopause with low mood, anxiety and depression can be challenging, and whilst many people talk about the physical symptoms that might affect us, fewer are aware of the potential impact to our mental health during the hormonal shift.  I hope you find this episode useful and maybe you will join my free Masterclass in October where I focus on lifestyle medicine for improving mental health during menopause - it's so important that we talk about these issues so that women know how to help themselves if things are getting a bit much.  Take good care! 

Suicide Risk for Midlife Women - Why So Many Women Are Struggling With Poor Mental Health

This week is World Suicide Prevention Day and hopefully there will be lots of media coverage in encouraging a "Change in the Narrative" - to make conversations about this issue more commonplace. This in turn helps to reduce the stigma and smash the silence and makes it easier for people to ask for help.  You may have seen media coverage in recent times talking about the high number of male suicide deaths and men's mental health in general, which is definitely something that needs attention, but we have not seen anywhere near the same attention given to midlife women and the challenges that they might be silently struggling with during midlife; the chapter of peri menopause, becoming the sandwich generation, caring for ageing parents and other elders, whilst still keeping an eye on adult children and even grandchildren.  Once you stop and look at the research you will see some shocking statistics - indeed the majority of deaths by suicide are male, but what about the significant number of suicide attempts made by women all over the world? Do attempts not matter so much? Should we not be paying as much attention to PREVENTION for everyone seeing as suicide does not discriminate?  In this episode I am exploring the intersectionality of factors for midlife women that might explain the statistics behind sucide thoughts and attempts in midlife. I hope you will find it thought provoking and informative and that through conversations like this learn that we can ALL  make a difference - for a person in crisis as well as for ourselves as women.   

Menopause, Mental Health & Suicide Risk - more common than you think

*This episode talks about suicide and I hope will be useful to women, their friends, family, support network AND their employer* The coronor confirmed that the lady had indeed taken her own life, following perimenopause then menopause causing her mental health condition to have worsened - and tragically this situation is more common than you might think.  Often people think of menopause symptoms as just the hot flushes or night sweats when actually more women find the cognitive impact far more debilitating and as many as 1 in 10 women will have suicidal thoughts during this transition.  Sadly women often feel isolated, alone, misunderstood, misdiagnosed and even mistreated - this can worsen their situation and significantly impact an already troubled mind - we MUST get this message out there - you are not alone, you are not being dramatic, you are NOT making it up and you are NOT alone.  Donna Mann took her own life and this tragic loss should be prompting us all to get better informed, better educated, more aware and able to have conversations that matter - those conversations could be the difference between life and death.  Please do share this episode with friends, colleagues, HR professionals so that women like Donna get the help they need, before it is too late.  For more details visit my website and again please do with anyone else who might need it. 

Are you making time for what matters?

Yesterday I received the devastating news of the loss of an incredible woman - strong, confident, bold, kind, wise, caring and funny as heck! I thought she was invincible and when she got her cancer diagnosis I would have bet my house on her surviving.  Yesterday made me realise that tomorrow is not guaranteed. I know we say it all the time that life is too short but sometimes when you lose someone who really was so amazing, you realise that there is a sad truth in that. Today's episode is not polished or scripted or offering downloads for learning - it's from the heart and a reminder that we need to stop putting things off, quit losing time in perfectionism, being paralysed by not good enough, waiting for the perfect moment and we just need to make space.  I'm not being flippant, I have two ageing parents and my carenting responsibilities are heavy and very real, but I need to stop and look for even the tiniest glimmer of space for me to top up my cup too.  This episode is a tribute the the force that was an incredible influence in my life and she listened to my podcast too so I hope she hears this, wherever she has landed now.  For all midlife women who are doing a LOT and struggling with the juggle, and in memory of Anne-Marie, here's your reminder xxx 

Tired, stressed, cannot sleep? A Real Midlife Challenge

If you have ever had the experience where your mind just will not switch off - perhaps going to bed and you struggle to sleep, maybe you sit down for a rest and your inner voice reminds you of all the things you SHOULD be doing, when relaxation is almost impossible as you just cannot disconnect ... this episode is for you.  You are doing all the things that those self-care folks tell you to do - bedtime routine, switching off digital devices, drinking cups of herbal tea but still your mind is racing, over-thinking, so damn busy all of the time and even when you make time to specifically rest and relax, it just doesn't help.  As midlife women we are always juggling a lot, in a world that encourages us to keep on keeping on, and a sense of failing if we cannot cope with it all. The cost of that is our stress switch gets stuck and we cannot rest and relax, however much we try - in fact trying harder to rest and relax frustrates us and adds further to our challenge. So how do we fix it?  This season we are focussing on Really Useful Conversations for Midlife Women and I hope you are finding it useful? In this episode I refer to a free handout suggesting techniques you can try - it's available to Let me know what you think?