Robocop 3 is the embodiment of when a franchise has creatively exhausted itself. It feels and looks cheap; has nothing new to say; and tones down the series' signature violence to milk the most out of a dwindling audience.
For fans of the series, its existence must be heartbreaking. Robocop 3's ineptitude is on par with other disastrous sequels of the era, like Superman IV.
That is really all you can say about it. It recycles plot points from the first film and shamelessly calls back to things you loved from that one, as well. Its only novel introduction is a robot ninja assassin, whose fights with Robocop are so painfully slow, you will be tempted to watch them in 2x speed.
Thus, Robocop 3's 6% on Rotten Tomatoes should not come as a shock; but you should be dumbstruck to discover that it out-grossed its predecessor. Even with the PG-13 rating, that is astounding. Poor Murphy!
Now, sit back, optimize your prime directives with a Screamsickle from Six Point Brewery, and close your eyes during the jetpack scene! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Chumpzilla, and Bling Blake are clearing the streets of Old Detroit with McDaggett's goon squad!
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Sahara – Tequila Jones
Speed Racer – Go, Speed, Go!
Alita: Battle Angel – Panzer Kunst!
GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra – Send it to the Slaughter House
The Last Airbender – Burn the Footage
Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom – Tangbro and Splash
Madame Web – Ms. Spider-Cleo
Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania – Shrinking Returns
The Flash – A Hop, Skip, and a Tomato Can
Blue Beetle – Batman's a Fascist
Half Past Dead – Sentenced to Death Row
Expend4bles – Time to Retire
Killing Gunther – Earthquake Love
Hollywood Homicide – Stella!
The Great Christmas Movie Debate – Die Hard vs Lethal Weapon
Just Friends – Simply Hopsy
Palm Springs – Life on Repeat
So I Married an Axe Murderer – Head, Pod Now!
Summer Catch – Strike’s Out Looking
Werewolves Within – Guess Wholf?
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