I Feel Snitty with Craig Rozniecki
News:Politics
“If I lost $1,000,000,000” (to the tune of the Barenaked Ladies’ “If I Had a $1,000,000”)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
I'd be a genius (I would be a genius)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
I'd brilliantly talk of my genius (maybe at a KKK rally like normal)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
I'd smile very bigly (or is that big league? I'm not quite sure)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 I'd blame Biden
If I lost $1,000,000,000
I'd ask daddy for billions more
If I lost $1,000,000,000
I'd go to the million dollar store
If I lost $1,000,000,000
Maybe I could run for president, be a total asshole
[Not like a – you know – a real asshole. I mean, some say I stink, but they don’t know their ass from their butt. I do. I know more about butts than dentists. Yeah. That’s why I don’t go to dentists. I don’t want a colonoscopy. Butt cavities suck. Truth.]
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
I'd provide a half smirk (the ugly one you see in memes)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
I'd shrug like it was nothing much (a full shrug, nothing half-assed)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
I'd release all my tax returns (you know I'm kidding, right? Losers!)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 I'd blame Biden
If I lost $1,000,000,000
I’d laugh like there was no tomorrow
If I lost $1,000,000,000
Could drop cash 'til I lost a billion more
If I lost $1,000,000,000
I would still be such a yuge asshole
(Again, it’s not literal. The literal media. Who needs literal media anyway? Literal people? No such thing. They’re a hoax.)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
I'd marry wife 4 (not one who steals from O’Bummer)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
I'd start writing songs (like a dog named Ignoramus)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
I'd stop paying taxes (I was never paying them anyway)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 I'd blame Biden
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
If I lost $1,000,000,000 (If I lost $1,000,000,000)
If I lost $1,000,000,000
I'd be Trump.
Books
https://www.amazon.com/Craig-Rozniecki/e/B00JBQ95LO
Blog
https://thekind-heartedsmartaleck.blogspot.com/
https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki
”Griftin’” (parody based off the Clarence Carter song, ”Strokin’”)
MAGAts Here, MAGAts There, MAGAts Every-Flipping-Where
Jack Smith vs. Jacka$$
”Right the Right” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”See the Light”)
”Orwellian Poetry” (A. ”Woke Insomnia” / B. ”Project Real”) (parody based off Green Day’s song ”American Eulogy” (A. ”Mass Hysteria” / B. ”Modern World”))
”Slim-to-None Funds” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”21 Guns”)
”Erratic Days” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”The Static Age”)
”You’re Accused and Betrayed” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”Horseshoes and Handgrenades”)
”Senseless Mind Syndrome” (parody based off Green Day’s ”Restless Heart Syndrome”)
“¿Amar Old Glory Hole? (Brittle Don)” (parody based off Green Day’s song “¿Viva la Gloria? (Little Girl)”)
”Daughter’s Sexy” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”Murder City”)
”Harassing All Women and Girls” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”Last of the American Girls”)
”Pisstaker” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”Peacemaker”)
”He’s Jesus Nowhere” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”East Jesus Nowhere”)
”Stormy At Birth” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”Last Night on Earth”)
”Donnie’s a Zero” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”Christian’s Inferno”)
”Withholding the Bribery” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”Before the Lobotomy”)
“¡Amar Old Glory Hole!” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”¡Viva la Gloria!”)
”No More Honesty” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”Know Your Enemy”)
”34 Felony Crackdown” (parody based off Green Day’s song ”21st Century Breakdown”)
Join Podbean Ads Marketplace and connect with engaged listeners.
Advertise Today
Create your
podcast in
minutes
It is Free