The Angry Therapist Podcast

You’re Not Losing Desire - You’re Rewiring It

Many people reach a confusing moment in their healing journey: they start dating healthier partners… and suddenly desire feels flat. Calm feels boring. Chemistry disappears. In this solo episode, John Kim breaks down why this happens - and why it doesn’t mean anything is “wrong” with you.If you’ve ever wondered whether you can rewire attraction without forcing yourself into a relationship that doesn’t feel right, this conversation is for you. 🎙️ Host Links: Surf, Sex & Pancakes - Join John Kim for a surf retreat in Costa Rica. More information: HERE Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Relearning How to Feel Joy

What if the hardest part of healing isn’t pain — but joy? John Kim talks with Dr. MC McDonald about grief, intimacy, self-trust, and the quiet ways we hide when connection feels unsafe. MC shares why joy has been the hardest emotion to let in, and how learning to feel safe again changes everything. A grounded, human conversation about healing while still figuring it out. 🔗 Guest Links Dr. MC McDonald Instagram & TikTok: @mc.phd Website: https://www.drmcmcdonald.com 🎙️ Host Links: Surf, Sex & Pancakes - Join John Kim for a surf retreat in Costa Rica. More information: HERE Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

HARD THINGS TO BRING UP IN THERAPY | Dating, Distance & Letting Go

Some of the hardest questions we bring into therapy aren’t about what happened — they’re about why it hit so deeply. In this episode, we explore the quiet, uncomfortable moments many people struggle to name:the anxiety between dates, the sudden loss of attraction, the grief that feels bigger than a divorce, and the confusion of wanting connection while needing boundaries. These aren’t dramatic relationship crises — they’re quiet inner conflicts that many people carry alone. Naming them is often the first step toward clarity, self-respect, and emotional safety. If any of these questions sound familiar, this episode is for you. Host Links: Surf, Sex & Pancakes - Join John Kim for a surf retreat in Costa Rica. More information: HERE Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A Small Surf Moment With a Big Relationship Lesson

In this episode, John Kim shares a simple moment from the ocean that became a powerful lesson about relationships and emotional repair. While learning to surf in Costa Rica, two very different encounters in the water reveal why ruptures are unavoidable—but repair is everything. One moment of anger leads to disconnection. One moment of acknowledgment leads to instant safety and ease. John also shares details about his upcoming surf retreat in Costa Rica—a space to slow down, regulate the nervous system, build real connection, and experience the healing power of the ocean together. A reminder that the strength of any relationship isn’t measured by how little we rupture—but by how willing we are to repair. 🎙️ Host Links: Surf, Sex & Pancakes - Join John Kim for a surf retreat in Costa Rica. More information: HERE Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why You'll Never "Figure Life Out" (And Why That's Good News)

What if the problem isn’t that you haven’t found your purpose — but that you’re trying to find something that was never meant to be found? In this episode, John sits down with Bill Burnett and Dave Evans, co-creators of Designing Your Life, to explore a radically relieving idea: There is no final version of you. Instead of chasing meaning, purpose, or fulfillment as a destination, Bill and Dave invite us to see life as a process of becoming — and meaning as something we practice daily, not achieve once. This conversation is for anyone who feels behind, unfinished, or quietly exhausted from trying to “figure life out.” You don’t need a breakthrough. You need a reframe. 🔗 Guest links Website https://designingyour.life/ Join the Designing Your Life Newsletter https://designingyour.life/newsletter/  📚 Featured Book (Mentioned in Episode) ⁠https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/How-to-Live-a-Meaningful-Life/Bill-Burnett/9781668084892 Instagram https://www.instagram.com/fullyalive_bydesign/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices