According to Merriam-Webster, the word “conversation” has 36 synonyms, ranging from the alliterative (”confabulation”) to the arcane (”persiflage”). Why the linguistic profusion? Because conversing is a fundamental part — maybe the fundamental part — of being human.
We chat with our families, friends, strangers, and co-workers, and we communicate in phone calls, text messages, emails, and, occasionally, postcards. When these tête-à-têtes go well, it is oddly thrilling; we become better versions of ourselves — warmer and wiser, funnier, and consistently insightful. Best of all, a good dialogue is a direct route to connection. “The bond of all companionship,” wrote Oscar Wilde, “whether in marriage or in friendship, is conversation.”
But when a conversation goes poorly, when it stays on the surface (”what do you do for a living?”) or devolves into a sputtering mess of misunderstanding (”you’re overreacting!”), we don’t feel the invigorating pulse of connection. What we feel, instead, is the emotional equivalent of a busy signal.
So, this hour, we’re asking: how can we have better conversations? And to help answer that question, we’re joined by Charles Duhigg, a Pulitzer Prize–winning journalist and the bestselling author of “The Power of Habit” and now “Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection.” Charles, as you’ll hear, is something of supercommunicator himself, a lithe storyteller who’s as well-versed in evolutionary biology as he is in the latest psychology, and after studying the art and science of communication for the last few years, he’s concluded that anyone can become a great conversationalist. You just have to master a few simple skills. Tune in to find out what they are.
Host: Rufus Griscom
Guest: Charles Duhigg
Book: “Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection”
*THE NEXT BIG IDEA CLUB*
We all know that reading is the best investment we can make in ourselves, but figuring out what to read … well, that’s another matter. Which is why we started the Next Big Idea Club. We get the best new books — as chosen by our curators (Malcolm Gladwell, Adam Grant, Susan Cain, and Daniel Pink) — into the hands of curious people. Like you! Join us today at nextbigideaclub.com
EVENING ROCKET: Decoding Elon Musk’s Sci-Fi Visions of the Future
GOOD ANXIETY: Can You Turn Worrying Into a Superpower?
HACK YOUR HABITS: The Science of Making Changes That Stick
TOGETHER: The Surgeon General’s Prescription for Health and Happiness
SPIRITUAL TECHNOLOGIES: Two Scientists Debate the Benefits of Religion
DAWN OF EVERYTHING: The True History of Humanity
DOPAMINE NATION: Why the Modern World Puts Us All at Risk for Addiction
AMBITION: How to Achieve Success on Your Own Terms
FRIENDSHIP: The Science Behind Life’s Deepest Bond
EXPONENTIAL AGE: Everything Is Accelerating. Who’s at the Wheel?
NEW POWER: How to Spread Ideas, Build Movements, and Leap Ahead
SPORTS: Life Lessons From an Olympian, a Hockey Coach, and a Middle-Aged Beginner
FEELING & KNOWING: Unlocking the Secrets of Consciousness
Bonus: Adam Grant and Annie Murphy Paul
LAZINESS: There's No Such Thing
HOW TO CHANGE: Science-Backed Tips for Becoming Your Best Self (Katy Milkman & Daniel Pink)
RATIONALITY: Steven Pinker’s Love Song to Critical Thinking
LOONSHOTS: The Science of Generating Crazy Ideas (Safi Bahcall & Daniel Pink)
DEADLINE EFFECT: Can You Work Like It's the Last Minute Before the Last Minute?
EXTRA LIFE: We Doubled Life Expectancy in the Last Century. Can We Do It Again?
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