Can You Save a Marriage from Becoming High-Conflict After Having Children?

In this candid and eye-opening episode of How I Ally, Lucinda Koza is joined by relationship coach and therapist Rich Heller, founder of Rich in Relationship. With decades of experience—and deep personal insight—Rich helps parents navigate high-conflict relationships, rekindle emotional connection, and restore safety within their homes.

Together, they explore:

• Why new parenthood often becomes a flashpoint for relational stress
  
  
• How childhood wounds resurface in marriage—and what to do about it
  
  
• The evolution of modern masculinity and the need for emotional fluency
  
  
• Practical tools for fighting fair and building connection (hello, “I” statements!)
  
  
• The deep and often unspoken fear women carry in emotionally unsafe homes
  
  
• What real emotional safety feels like—and why it’s essential for healthy parenting
  
  

This conversation is raw, validating, and essential listening for any couple trying to stay connected in the midst of sleep deprivation, identity shifts, and unhealed emotional baggage.

Favorite quote:

“We pick our partners because we feel safe enough to unpack our stuff around each other. But the problem is—we didn’t give each other that heads up.” – Rich Heller

Connect with Rich:

Website: www.richinrelationship.com

Instagram: @richinrelationship

Podcast: Rich in Relationship – Available on all major platforms

Resources mentioned:

• “I” statements framework
  
  
• The concept of emotional fluency in relationships
  
  
• Postpartum rage, hormone detox, and parenting dynamics
  
  

✨ If this episode resonated with you, please leave a review or share it with someone in the early stages of parenting or partnership. You’re not alone—and you deserve safety and support.