Working and parenting often feel like being pulled in two different directions. But what if we could reframe our thinking and actually appreciate that our experiences in one role can enhance the quality of life in the other. We explore the ways you can reframe your mindset with author and podcaster Yael Schonbrun.
“If we’re able to see that there are opportunities for our roles to feed each other, then we're more likely to to access those experiences and benefit more from them.” ~ Yael Schonbrun, Episode 346
Yael Schonbrun is an assistant professor of psychology at Brown University, a family therapist, and co-host of the podcast Psychologists Off the Clock. In her new book Work, Parent, Thrive: 12 Science-Backed Strategies to Ditch Guilt, Manage Overwhelm, and Grow Connection (When Everything Feels Like Too Much) Yael offers practical strategies from clinical psychology and social science to better manage the conflict and enhance enrichment in work, parenting, and the balance of these meaningful roles.
Regular listeners will have noticed that co-host of the show, Tim Houlihan is unfortunately off sick for a few episodes of Behavioral Grooves. So on this episode, producer of the show, Mary Kaliff, joins Kurt Nelson for the discussion with Yael. Listeners can jump on social media (Twitter: @THoulihan or LinkedIn) and wish Tim a speedy recovery.
We hope this episode provides you with some practical tools to help you work, parent and thrive. If you do enjoy Behavioral Grooves, please write a short review of the show on your podcast player. Just sharing a short sentence about why you like the show can make it easier for other people to find the podcast.
Topics
(3:32) Welcome and speed round questions.
(8:33) Why parenting is difficult even for experts.
(12:07) How a mindset shift can change how we view our parenting and our work.
(16:00) The questions you can ask yourself to change your mindset.
(19:22) How Yael tapped into her own personal values during a difficult time.
(24:46) Pains live right alongside gains.
(29:32) How Jewish kibbutz communities raised children.
(32:42) Why we need to quit the things that aren’t working.
(36:36) How to nurture more independence in our children.
(40:03) The 3 components of self compassion.
(45:34) Modeling the behavior that you want your kids to develop.
(46:54) What music would Yael take to a desert island?
(48:54) Grooving Session with Kurt and Mary on working, parenting and thriving.
© 2023 Behavioral Grooves
Links
Yael Schonbrun: https://yaelschonbrun.com/
Yael’s book, “Work, Parent, Thrive: 12 Science-Backed Strategies to Ditch Guilt, Manage Overwhelm, and Grow Connection (When Everything Feels Like Too Much)”: https://amzn.to/3IVEzNk
Growth mindset, Carol Dweck: “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success”: https://amzn.to/3J7V9tD
Episode 327, A Proven Way Expectations Can Unlock A More Positive Life | David Robson: https://behavioralgrooves.com/episode/expectations-and-a-positive-life/
Episode 345, The Tools You Need To Embrace Uncertainty | Nathan and Susannah Harmon Furr: https://behavioralgrooves.com/episode/tools-to-embrace-uncertainty/
Episode 342: Why Resilience Is More Than Just Bouncing Back | Gabriella Rosen Kellerman MD: https://behavioralgrooves.com/episode/resilience-more-than-bouncing-back/
Musical Links
Weird Al Yankovic “Another One Rides The Bus”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79QxturUolo
Taylor Swift “Midnight Rain”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Odh9ddPUkEY
Delusions Can Actually Be Useful: Hidden Brain’s Shankar Vedantam Reveals How [Republish]
How To Find Meaning IN Life | Dr Brian Lowery PhD
How Do Incentives Actually Impact Motivation? | Dr Indranil Goswami PhD
Groove Track: Cab Driver Study
Can You Really Love Things As Much As People? With Aaron Ahuvia
The Loss of Common Sense: How To Gain A Little Perspective | Martin Lindstrom
Trust Your Gut? Only If The Data Supports It | Seth Stephens-Davidowitz
Changing Our Mind: Exploring How Mental Illness Is Managed with Daniel Bergner
Finding Out What Your Customers Want and Why It Matters | Andrea Belk Olson
From Distracted To Focused: Nir Eyal’s Secrets On How To Be Indistractable
You Have Dignity Because You’re Human, Not Because You Work | Jonathan Malesic
How To Fix Burnout (Hint: It Isn’t Another Yoga Session) | Jennifer Moss
You Can Change Someone’s Mind But Are You Sure You Want To? | David McRaney
Changing The World with Persistent Optimism | Dr. Paul Zeitz
Want To Improve Your Kid’s Behavior? Start With Your Own | Sue Donnellan
Three Easy Ways to Nurture A Child’s Brain Development | Dana Suskind MD
Fail to Scale: Why Good Research Doesn’t Always Make Great Policy | John A. List
For Revolutionary Solutions, Look To Evolutionary Ideas | Sam Tatam
Why Mindset Matters Most: The Secrets of Achievement | Paul Szyarto
Women Do Too Much Non-Promotable Work: How To Say No More with Linda Babcock
Create your
podcast in
minutes
It is Free
The Poetry of Science
Hidden Brain
The Science of Happiness
The Psychology Podcast
Choiceology with Katy Milkman