The ADHD Smarter Parenting‘s Podcast
Kids & Family:Parenting
Today’s podcast covers the when pillar. In implementing new teaching, parents ask, “When is a good time to teach behavior skills to address problems?? The answer: As soon as possible.
The object of any corrective teaching is to bring a child back to a non-escalated state as quickly as possible.
By teaching to the negative behavior as soon as possible, you keep the problem from escalating. The longer you wait until you address the behavior, the more work you have to do to correct their behavior.
Each of us has a tolerance level of what behaviors we will accept before intervening. For some parents, they have a very low tolerance level and step in very early on to address problems. For other parents, they have a very high tolerance level and will only step in after things have gotten way out of hand.
We should work to have low tolerance levels as having low tolerance levels makes life more comfortable and improve relationships with our kids.
What does this acttually look like?
Your son is playing with your daughter, and she takes his toy. Because you have a low tolerance level, you would intervene at this point and work to deescalate the situation.
What if you don’t step in? Think of what happens next. Your daughter has taken another toy. Now your son is not only crying, but he’s also starting yelling and getting angry. He tries to grab the toy from his sister. She’s teasing him and holding the toy away. His frustrating level has now reached a breaking point, and he starts hitting his sister.
Do you see how much more corrective you need to do to address the situation because you waited to step in?
How long will parents need to teach new behaviors? As long as it takes. There is no magic formula as you’re working with children who have their own thoughts, feelings, and personalities. It may be frustrating if the change is slow. Keep at it. Eventually, you will see a return on your investment.
The behavior skills that parents need to teach their children come from the Teaching-Family Model and can be found on SmarterParenting.com.
For full show notes and transcripts visit: https://www.smarterparenting.com/adhd-parenting-podcast/
Join the Smarter Parenting Club. https://club.smarterparenting.com/
Ep #132: Helping a child calm down from a tantrum
Ep #131: Creating a safe place for kids to talk about hard topics
Ep #130: This is not what I signed up for | When ADHD symptoms aren't textbook
Ep #129: Why you're seeing increased negative behaviors
Ep #128: Neurodiversity and helping kids who learn differently
Ep #127: When you love your child but don't always like your child
Ep #126: Why kids see time differently
Ep #125: The skills are solutions
Ep #124: The difference between coaching and therapy
Ep #123: How to talk to your kids about racism and other difficult topics
Ep #122: Special education and the law with Catherine Michael
Ep #121: It's okay not to be okay
Ep #120: Coping with pandemic exhaustion and changing needs
Ep #119: Creating normalcy when things feel uncertain
Bonus episode: In difficult times, seek out the helpers
Ep #118: When a child's negative behavior affects the whole family
Ep #117: I am not the parent I thought I would be
Ep #116: Using Effective Communication to build deeper connections
Ep #115: Working with organizations that help victims of human trafficking
Ep #114: Helping kids focus and stay on task
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