How Expectations Shape Who We Become

In this special episode inspired by questions from our Facebook Community, we explore why big change feels intimidating even though most transformation happens quietly in our daily lives. Kurt and Tim dig into the micro-shifts we overlook, the powerful role expectations play in shaping our confidence and identity, and why surrounding yourself with people who expand your sense of possibility truly matters. They also revisit classic and modern goal-setting research — from Kurt Lewin’s “levels of aspiration” to today’s best evidence — to show how balancing past performance with future dreams helps you find the motivating sweet spot that keeps you moving forward.

A Note From Our Team: This show exists because of the community around it — the questions you ask, the curiosity you bring, and the support you’ve given us. If you’d like to help us keep producing independent, ad-free behavioral science content, we’d be grateful for your support on Substack. Your contribution sets the expectation that this work matters — and helps us keep delivering it. Support us here.

Topics

[0:00] Change and Its Implications

[4:00] The Impact of Incremental Change on Personal Growth

[8:41] The Pygmalion Effect

[16:14] Goal Setting: Past Performance vs Future Dreams

[25:39] Incremental Goals vs. Aspirational Goals

[29:11] Our Facebook Community: Coffee or Tea?

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