The Lies We Believe About Control | Dr. Wolfgang Linden

Psychologist and author Dr. Wolfgang Linden joins us to explore why so much of our stress comes not from events themselves, but from our attempts to control them. Drawing on 40+ years of research and clinical experience, he breaks down the “illusion of control” and argues that we only truly have power over two things: how we respond and where we direct our energy. We dive into his emotion–thought–behavior framework, the dangers of suppressing emotions, and how small shifts in attention and behavior can interrupt toxic cycles. From relationships to health to life goals, Wolfgang shows how letting go can actually give us more peace, more agency, and a clearer path forward—sometimes even by knowing when to quit.

Topics

[0:00] Introduction and Speed Round with Dr. Wolfgang Linden

[6:08] Emotions: friend or foe?

[13:38] Behavior change and depression

[17:51] When to persist vs. when to quit

[26:23] Stress, values, and life priorities

[31:39] Saying yes to opportunities

[36:05] What to do when stuck in a rut

[43:37] Desert Island music

[48:36] Grooving session: attention, focus, and letting go

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Links

About Dr. Wolfgang Linden

The Illusion of Control: A Practical Guide to Avoid Futile Struggles by Wolfgang Linden

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Musical Links

Jethro Tull - Locomotive Breath

Franz Schubert - Symphony No. 8 (Unfinished)