He Said/She Said: Waking Up to Real Love After Divorce

Children of divorce can learn love, compassion, responsibility, accountability, forgiveness, boundaries, kindness, and consideration for others.

Counseling is not an automatic panacea but keep at it and persist. There may be lapses.

One person can not fix a marriage; it takes two. If you reach a point of no hope then that is the breaking point.

Physical and expressive outlets are positive. During tango for example, partners need to lean on each other. Marriage is analogous to tango dance. Actions speak louder than words.

Simply moving from one relationship to another is not a solution. Problems carry into each relationship: grief, unresolved issues, hopes and dreams all need to be processed before a new relationship. Relationships are based on wholeness. People should feel peaceful and worthy of love.

Identify and acknowledge your feelings: I belong, I am worthy, I am capable of being loved. Recognize triggers that set your feelings off that you are not valued. A third-party can help you untangle your feelings vs. your partner's baggage.

We are attracted to people who share core values but both partners need to be conscious of their feelings, harmful words, and triggers.

Programs such as Marriage Encounter can help encourage healthy relationships.

Therapy early on in a relationship is beneficial. Health is wholistic: physically, rationally, spiritually, and emotionally. An annual contract with an option to renew is worth considering. Check in regularly with your partner. Give and receive.

You are either dynamically building walls or bridges with your partner.

Find a support network and re-learn how to love yourself. You are enough. Pursue who I should become and not who I should find. Not all religious counselors are created equal. You have to find the correct advisors. Look for people who stretch a hand down to help you up like a child who needs assistance when learning how to walk.

Some groups are trauma dumping so avoid those and you may need to keep looking to find a compatible group.

Say yes to all activities that are not obviously harmful. Be open to new life experiences, be curious, explore, expand, network, and look for opportunities. There are beautiful things following the aftermath of trauma. For example, forests restore health after a fire.

Look for healthy information such as the Wake Up to Real Love podcast.

Turn lessons into blessings. To reach Dawn:

512-773-5860

https://www.facebook.com/theawakeningwithdawn/

https://www.dawnrishard.com

Wake Up to Real Love

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/wake-up-to-real-love/id1472828220

Learn more about your hosts Mick Smith and Kindra Riber. They are waging the war on ending the pain of divorce, parental alienation, custody battles and the break-up of families. Their purpose is to give you the tools on how to heal in the aftermath of family trauma and drama.

Learn more about Mick Smith:

Get Mick's Book: Burning America: Amazon.com: Burning America: In the Best Interest of The Children?: 9781956353259: Smith, G Mick: Books

Listen to his podcast: The Doctor of Digital™ GMick Smith, PhD | Podcasts on Audible | Audible.com

Learn More About Kindra Riber:

Meet Kindra | Speak Life Into Stri (kindraspeaks.com)

If you are going through a high-conflict divorce or a custody battle, please reach out to us at:

theaftermathhealing@gmail.com

This has been a Mediacasters Production.