Ep. 78: Childhood abuse doesn't have to define you

TW: My guest today is Debra Blackman. Debra tells us about sexual abuse that happened to her as a child, so if that’s likely to be difficult for you to hear, please do switch off from this episode.

Growing up in a family with an affluent facade, Debra suffered in silence from sexual abuse by a family member until she was 17. Her mother failed to see her plight. When the family moved home, Debra experienced bullying and isolation, and struggled to face the situation she was in. The abuse from her father reached a breaking point when she was 18, and she finally stood up to him, leading to her being kicked out of her own home with just £5 to her name.

It's not surprising that this difficult start took Debra down a toxic path in her relationships over the next few years, but today she is a top flight banker and CEO, providing an example of how it’s possible to overcome even the worst kind of experiences and build a life you can love.

Debra tells us how her behaviour reflected what was happening to her, how therapy changed her mindset about her life, and how she hasn't allowed the abuse to define her. She also says how hard it was to walk away from the abuse when she was very young, and acknowledges that she wasn't ready to tackle her trauma until the time was right.

Who is Debra Blackman?

Debra is the owner of Viessentially, an exectuive PA service.

More teenage parenting from Helen Wills:

Helen wills is a teen mental health podcaster and blogger at Actually Mummy, a resource for midlife parents of teens.

Thank you for listening! Subscribe to the Teenage Kicks podcast to hear new episodes. If you have a suggestion for the podcast please email teenagekickspodcast@gmail.com.

There are already stories from fabulous guests about difficult things that happened to them as teenagers - including losing a parent, becoming a young carer, and being hospitalised with mental health problems - and how they overcame things to move on with their lives.

You can find more from Helen Wills on parenting teenagers on Instagram and Twitter @iamhelenwills.

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Please note that Helen Wills is not a medical expert, and nothing in the podcast should be taken as medical advice. If you're worried about yourself or a teenager, please seek support from a medical professional.

Podcast produced by James Ede at Be Heard production.