90. Overcoming fear of failure

Drop your standards! Let go of your perfectionistic tendencies!

If I were paid a dollar every time I heard this message, I would have a large bank account by now.

When you’re pursuing a top performance – from athletic to intellectual to artistic ones – it’s fundamental that you distinguish those common principles that improve your performance and your well-being altogether.

In this episode, Brad Stulberg and I discussed research-based skills to deal with high-achieving and striving behaviors in a skillful manner and without losing yourself.

Key Takeaways

• How to distinguish when perfectionistic actions are working for you or against you
• The difference between values-based goals and ego-driven goals
• How to avoid burnout in the information era
• How to manage your proneness to perfectionistic actions
• Day-to-day experiences of experiential avoidance
• Tips to handle the fear of failure
• How to figure out what is on the other side of your fears
• How to practice self-compassion when handling our fears

Show notes with time stamps

00:31 Understanding Fear-Based Reactions

01:02 Overcoming Perfectionism

01:36 Interview with Brad Stulberg: High Achieving and Striving Behaviors

02:19 Reflecting on Your Life and Overcoming Overthinking

03:28 Living According to Your Values

04:10 Using a Values-Based Review to Live the Life You Want

04:46 Conversation with Brad Stulberg: Balancing Productivity and Wellbeing

05:43 Understanding the Double-Edged Sword of Optimization

08:44 Dealing with Fear of Failure and Regret

17:48 Navigating Ego-Driven Goals and Values-Based Goals

24:09 Overcoming Experiential Avoidance

(*) Show notes and resources of this episode

(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe

(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head

(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses

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