My first 10 days vipassana silent meditation retreat experience or how 100 hours of meditation turned into 100 shades of grey

Meditation has been a big part of my life and teachings for the past half-decade. 

I turned into guided or visual meditations for peace and insights. 

 

YET what I have felt and experienced on the 10 days silent meditation vipassana course in Joshua Tree was nothing like I have ever imagined or expected. 

 

Vipassana, which means to see things as they really are, is one of India's most ancient techniques of meditation. It was rediscovered by Gotama Buddha more than 2500 years ago and was taught by him as a universal remedy for universal ills, i.e., an Art Of Living. This non-sectarian technique aims for the total eradication of mental impurities and the resultant highest happiness of full liberation.

 

Vipassana is a way of self-transformation through self-observation. It focuses on the deep interconnection between mind and body, which can be experienced directly by disciplined attention to the physical sensations that form the life of the body, and that continuously interconnect and condition the life of the mind. It is this observation-based, self-exploratory journey to the common root of mind and body that dissolves mental impurity, resulting in a balanced mind full of love and compassion.

 

The scientific laws that operate one's thoughts, feelings, judgments and sensations become clear. Through direct experience, the nature of how one grows or regresses, how one produces suffering or frees oneself from suffering is understood. Life becomes characterized by increased awareness, non-delusion, self-control and peace.

 

And even though my mind could appreciate and grasp all of this as making sense I also found myself in moments of expectations, doubts, comparing with other methods I teach and practice (like breathwork detox). 

 

The first three days were challenging because I felt like I couldn’t understand why it is supposed to be hard work, why we get to sit in silence and meditate for 10 hours a day when with breathwork I see instant results in me and clients after just one session. 

 

That is why I feel it is important to come with intention yet no expectation and leave all that you have been and did up until then behind the door vs bringing it in with you. 

 

I am so thankful for this course because it helped me observe my habits, my thoughts and also my desires and things I would rather abort. 

 

Day 5 and 6 were challenging in such a surprising way as I experienced lots of desires, sensuality and planning all the possible and impossible details on how to spice up our intimate life at home. The things you come up with when you are sitting with your thoughts in 10 hours is astonishing lol 

 

And the last few days I was going in and out of my concentration. I found myself connecting to my body and sensations, and moments where I was wondering when this meditation hour is going to end and if the teacher forgot to look at the time. 

 

As with anything with life you get to listen to your intuition, trust what is calling you and to what is your next step.

 

When I was asked if I would do this again, my first reaction was NO! AND when I step back now knowing what is and will be happening there I know I would be more prepared and surrendered even deeper. 

 

Do you have a meditation practice? Share with me on IG @petiakolibova or email me on hello@petiakolibova.com would love to hear what is helping you to create peace in your life. 

 

PS. For all my California ladies we are hosting an amazing FREE EVENT in Huntington Beach, California with my amazing client @damarigold where we will network, connect and share with you how we have created our abundance so you too can take the Path to Prosperity. 

 

RSVP below for this event as the spaces are limited to only 30 women:

https://bit.ly/PathToProsperityNetworking