230 - Believe In Yourself

We've been discussing how the Torah commentaries break down emunah into three parts. The first one, simple emunah and bitachon, placing our trust and reliance on Hashem, as we've discussed much about. The second one, emunas chachamim, where we extend our belief in Hashem to belief in the words of Moshe Rabbeinu, and by extension, the sages, where the tradition was passed down early to, from generation to generation. And the third category of emunah that Torah commentaries outline is having emunah in yourself. Rav Tzadok HaKoen, as well as many other Torah commentaries, discuss this idea. 

When we wake up in the morning, the first line we are supposed to say is "modeh ani", which ends with the words "rabba emunasecha". One interpretation of these words is, "Hashem, your emunah in me is very great." We are declaring that Hashem has a lot of faith in me. Hashem created me in the first place, and He decided that today I should wake up again for a new day. If there was no purpose for me in the world today, and I believe that Hashem orchestrates every single detail in the world, then why would He have given me another day of life? There is no question in the world that if I woke up today, I have a very specific purpose that nobody else in the world can fulfill. 

And in the words of the Gemara, every person is obligated to believe, "bishvili nivra haolam" - that the entire world was created just for me. Let's just take those words to heart. All the people in the world, all the investments, all the projects, the sun, moon, and stars, and we can go on. It was all created for one purpose; just for me. Digesting that idea should help motivate me what a tremendous opportunity I have in this world. But not only that, what a tremendous responsibility I have in this world. Because in Hashem's greatness, He is able to create everything exclusively just for you, and He is able to do that with regards to everyone. Now if Hashem decided to create this entire world, including everything comprised within it, just for you, there is no question He believes in you, and you have a purpose in this world that nobody else can fulfill. 

If Hashem believes in you, and you decide not to believe in yourself, in a sense one is denying Hashem. Hashem is saying X, and I am saying Y. By the fact that Hashem gave me the abilities in what I have to contribute to the world, from the smallest of the smallest ways, to the biggest of the biggest ways; if I have the ability to give somebody a smile, which is one of the greatest mitzvos, or perhaps I am in a position to give charity, or perhaps I am able to learn Torah, or perhaps I am able to pray, talking to Hashem in my own words, and the list goes on and is tailor-made for every individual - every single one of us has our unique talents and abilities, and we are therefore called on to believe in ourselves. When a person commits a sin, one might feel, maybe I am not worthy anymore, but again, if I woke up today, Hashem believes in me. Even if it was the worst of sins, Hashem believes in me, that there is potential for me to do teshuvah and rectify what I did wrong and become great.

Just like when it comes to emunah, one can never tell the true level of somebody else's emunah. Sometimes, two people who are presented with a potentially anxiety-provoking situation may respond in a similar manner. They both might be very calm. It could be that the one individual's natural tendency is just to be calm, even though they might have barely worked on their emunah and bitachon. And certainly this is barely an achievement, because this is just the way Hashem made them. It could be the other individual naturally leans towards feelings of anxiety, and because of this individual's growth in emunah and bitachon, is now able to feel calm.

And in a similar vein, when it comes to people who appear to be self-confident, it can come in one of two different ways. Sometimes that self-confidence can come from a place completely contrary to the values of emunah. Sometimes people believe in themselves because they believe they are the master to their own destiny, and because they have been successful in some areas of their life, that leads them to arrogance and sometimes can be viewed as self-confidence. Whereas another individual who is on the path of true emunah and bitachon might be led to a place of true self-confidence, not because of arrogance, God forbid, but rather because if Hashem believes in me, I can certainly believe in myself.