The Mind Your Body Podcast: Tools for Healthy Transformation
Health & Fitness
MYB EPISODE 39: ESCAPING THE PRISON OF “SHOULD”: RECLAIMING THE POWER TO CHOOSE
THE PROBLEM WITH “SHOULD”
How many times have you said something like:
Now: How many times did one of these “I should” statements motivate you to do the thing you think you “should” do?
OR, did saying “I should” trigger you to move in the OPPOSITE direction out of a sense of rebellion, resistance, guilt, shame, or overwhelm at the mere prospect of doing the thing?
Even worse, did saying “I should” damage your ability to enjoy what you actually WERE deciding to do because of the overhanging guilt of what you thought you “should” be doing?
This is the problem with should: It is NOT motivating; quite the opposite, in fact!
WHERE DOES THE IDEA OF “SHOULD” COME FROM?
Should comes from a sense of external pressure, rather an empowered choice to take action because we’re clear on the payoff.
It comes from comparison with what others are doing, saying, or achieving.
It does NOT come from an intrinsically driven decision about what WE want and feel worthy and capable of achieving.
And, because it doesn’t feel like our choice, we aren’t remotely motivated to take action!
This gap – or prison - between what we think we “SHOULD” do and our inaction or rebellion triggers us to feel:
This is SO damaging!
HOW TO ESCAPE THE PRISON OF SHOULD
IT’S TIME
Our time here is finite. It’s incumbent on us to rise up in our own lives and DECIDE how we want to live!
Should is joyless prison of guilt, shame, and inertia.
Fortunately, the key to the prison door is in our own hands. We just need to use it.
We’d love to know your thoughts. Was this helpful? Do you have other topics you’d like to hear us discuss? Let us know on our MYB Facebook page!
xo,
Lisa and Jenny, co-hosts
The Mind Your Body Podcast
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