Torture museums: Are they ghastly tourist traps with acute deficiencies of taste or family-friendly opportunities for history lessons? I have no clue! But I've been to two of them, one in Wisconsin and one in Florida, and they couldn't have been more different experiences from each other. Let's visit them together now, and learn the shameful secret of all medieval torture museums. With bonus serial killer severed head and alien implant asides.

• Photos from the Museum of Historic Torture Devices in the Wisconsin Dells.
• Address for the Museum of Historic Torture Devices: 305 Broadway, Wisconsin Dells, WI
• Photos from the Medieval Torture Museum in St. Augustine, Florida
• Address for the Medieval Torture Museum: 100 St George St, St. Augustine, FL
• My visit to the severed head of the Dusseldorf Vampire.
• My Cursed Objects book is up for preorder.
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• I also write other books that you can buy. Spooky books.