Light in the Battle: Autism, Single Motherhood and Trauma Recovery

16-B. The 6 Steps to Break the Trauma Bond - Normalizing Stress Hormone Levels - Chaos Addiction Mini-Series, 4/4 - Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, Season 2

We now need to bring the cortisol, adrenaline, dopamine levels back to normal. In this final episode about breaking the addiction to chaos, Faustina goes over 6 steps that worked for her, when she DECIDED to LEARN to enjoy peace. With compassion and understanding, with humour and Catholic faith, with small action steps that are easy to implement, she describes what has worked for her to bring the levels of the neurochemicals back to healthy levels and thereby, heal the trauma bond.Chaos and danger are a true neurochemical addiction. Faustina was able to overcome the trauma bond by inventing 6 steps for herself, based on her very basic understanding of things she found online. She goes over these steps as possible shortcuts in your recovery from narcissistic abuse, legal abuse, or any form of childhood trauma that may have wired your brain to crave chaos.Autistic women are particularly prone to this addiction,because they have a craving for predictability, patterns, the type you see in the cycle of abuse... Women with ASD are often more vulnerable to harmful relational patterns and can get pulled into cycles of instability very easily. These 6 steps to break the addiction to chaos incorporate aCatholic interpretation of why that peace feels foreign, despite God’s promise, “My peace I give you”. We stress the importance of the Rosary, the Eucharist, and Confession, as rhythm and structure. You can pray novenas for peace,novenas for protection, sure, but you should also learn about the science of addiction!Season 2, Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court (starting with this "addiction to chaos"mini-series) is a Liberation Series that suggests things to look into as you rebuild yourself, so that you can become the version of yourself that is so detached emotionally, that you can prepare for family court correctly. Emotional detachment is where I want to help you get to, so that any thoughts I may have about court prep actually land. DETACH, BABY, DETACH!Here is the order I recommend for your healing journeytowards emotional freedom, as you work to become a new version of yourself - the version that can actually win in court:First step is to think about not going back. There's a true addiction to chaos:⁠⁠Episode 15A⁠⁠, ⁠⁠Episode15B⁠⁠, Episode 16A, Episode 16B. You then want to work with a therapist and see if you carry PTSD, and what types of therapy will help you heal the PTSD. For me, it was EMDR: Episode 17, Episode 18. You then want to see Forgiveness as a tactical advantage and as a massive step in your personal development. That's Episode 19. The next things to think about in your emotional detachment journey, will be codependency and gratitude. Follow the show so you can hear the entire Season 2 about Emotional Detachment. While you wait for the entire season 2 to come out about Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠Episode 9: The Court Date you Can't Stop Thinking About - Breaking the Anxiety Spiral⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.Light in the Battle is where you come to think about how toheal from trauma, how to break the addiction to chaos, how to recover from narcissistic abuse or legal trauma, and about nervous system recovery. This content is for general information and inspiration only. It is not medical, mental‑health, legal, or professional advice, and it isn’t a substitute for advice tailored to your situation. Please seek support from a qualified professional.Choose to find Light in the Battle. Your circumstances (yourASD diagnosis as an adult woman, your PDA child's nervous system, your high-conflict coparenting reality, and single motherhood) will not change any time soon, but the trauma neurochemistry and the harmful levels of the neurochemicals can. To go deeper into the neurochemistry behind stress, overwhelm, and emotional intensity, Huberman’s episode “⁠⁠Tools for Managing Stress & Anxiety⁠⁠” expands on the dopamine, cortisol, and survival-mode loops.

16-A. Trauma Bond Science - Why Do I Keep Going Back? Brain Chemicals Behind the Addiction - Chaos Addiction Mini-Series, 3/4 - Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, Season 2

"Why didn't she leave", you ask. "Why does she keep dating the same types of men over and over? When will she learn? "Sounds familiar? Don't we just love that judgment coming from uneducated, well-meaning people who are not familiar with the concept of trauma bonding.Well... It's biology. Childhood trauma and/or narcissistic abuse can create a true addiction in the brain. A trauma bond. This Episode is the logical next step in our Chaos Addiction Mini-Series, after Episode 15 A and Episode 15B, where we talked about how things feel and how we suffer from the boredom and the deafening silence that follow years of running on adrenaline, oxytocin and cortisol - but precisely, we didn't dive into the brain chemicals and the biology of addiction to chaos. Here, Faustina goes over:the various stress hormones involved in abusive relationships, (cortisol, adrenaline, dopamine and oxytocin)what that addiction may look like for autistic women,the unfortunate rewiring of the brain that makes it challenging for a narcissistic abuse survivor to settle away from chaos, how it feels when you really really want to get out but can't seem to, how that wiring can be healed, even when it comes from childhood,very concrete, ASD-friendly, actionable choices survivors on the spectrum can make to get those hormone levels back to normal, and build bridges away from chaos and towards peace. Please leave this show a 5* review.In 16B we will talk about concrete steps to normalize the levels of the neurochemicals we described here. More here about ⁠Trauma Bond Science⁠ with Darlene Lancer.Season 2, Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court (starting with this "addiction to chaos" mini-series) is aLiberation Series that suggests things to look into as you rebuild yourself, so that you can become the version of yourself that is so detached emotionally, that you can prepare for family court correctly. Emotional detachment is where I want to help you get to, so that any thoughts I may have about court prep actually land. DETACH, BABY, DETACH!Here is the order I recommend for your healing journey towards emotional freedom, as you work to become a new version of yourself -the version that can actually win in court:First step is to not go back. There's a true addiction to chaos: ⁠⁠⁠Episode 15A⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠Episode15B⁠⁠⁠, ⁠Episode 16A⁠, Episode 16B. You then want to work with a therapist and see if you carry PTSD, and what types of therapy will help you heal the PTSD.For me, it was EMDR: Episode 17, Episode 18. You then want to see Forgiveness as a tactical advantage and as a massive step in your personal development.That's Episode 19. The next things to think about in your liberation and in reclaiming your dignity, will be codependency and gratitude. Follow the show so you can hear the entire Season 2 about Emotional Detachment. While you wait for the entire season 2 to come out about Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, check out ⁠⁠Episode9: The Court Date you Can't Stop Thinking About - Breaking the Anxiety Spiral⁠⁠⁠.Light in the Battle is where you come to think about how to heal from trauma, how to break the addiction to chaos, how to recover from narcissistic abuse, how to become the person you need to be in order to win a custody battle, and about nervous system recovery. This content is for general information and inspiration only. It reflects lived experience and summaries of publicly available research. It is not medical, mental‑health, legal, or professional advice, and it isn’t a substitute for advice tailored to your situation. Please seek support from a qualified professional who understands your needs.

15-B. The 6 Tips to Thrive When the Chaos Ends Despite the Addiction - Chaos Addiction Mini-Series Part 2/4 - Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, Season 2

"Why does this keep happening to me?" "Why do I keep attracting narcissists?" You choose to stop. With 6 ASD-friendly practical tips that Faustina used repeatedly in her journey of taming peace after years of running on adrenaline and cortisol, we can slowly familiarize ourselves with our new life. Whether that's getting out of domestic violence, healing from narcissistic abuse, or winning a custody battle in family court, there's going to be a point where things will stop being a constant threat, a constant chaos loop. And your brain won't like it. So here are 6 trauma informed, practical ways that you teach your brain to enjoy the quiet after the storm, so you can settle into it, and change the course of your life - one day at a time!Addiction to chaos is a real thing. In this episode we get practical with 6 mindset shifts and day-to-day habits that may help us not dive head first into another problem, another abusive relationship, another overwhelming situation. In the next episode we nerd out on the hormones in the brain that drive that addiction, and how we can help normalize those hormone levels. I want to point you to one of my biggest pillars in my trauma recovery, Dr. Ramani, who teaches from a more authoritative perspective, things you need to know about narcissism, NPD, and about recovery. The content in this podcast is for general information and education only. It reflects lived experience and summaries of publicly available research. It is not medical, mental‑health, legal, or professional advice, and it isn’t a substitute for advice tailored to your situation. Please seek support from a qualified professional who understands your needs.Season 2, Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court (starting with this "addiction to chaos" mini-series) is aLiberation Series that suggests things to look into as you rebuild yourself, so that you can become the version of yourself that is so detached emotionally, that you can prepare for family court correctly. Emotional detachment is where I want to help you get to, so that any thoughts I may share about court prep actually land. DETACH, BABY, DETACH!Here is the order I recommend for your healing journey towards emotional freedom, as you work to become a new version of yourself -the version that can actually win in court:First step is to not go back. There's a true addiction to chaos: ⁠⁠Episode 15A⁠⁠, ⁠⁠Episode15B⁠⁠, Episode 16A, Episode 16B. You then want to work with a therapist and see if you carry PTSD, and what types of therapy will help you heal the PTSD.For me, it was EMDR: Episode 17, Episode 18. You then want to see Forgiveness as a tactical advantage and as a massive step in your personal development.That's Episode 19. The next things to think about in your liberation and in reclaiming your dignity, will be codependency and gratitude. Follow the show so you can hear the entire Season 2 about Emotional Detachment. While you wait for the entire season 2 to come out about Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, check out ⁠Episode9: The Court Date you Can't Stop Thinking About - Breaking the Anxiety Spiral⁠⁠. 

15-A. How Winning in Family Court Revealed my Addiction to Chaos - Chaos Addiction Mini-Series Part 1/4 - Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, Season 2

Through the story of winning a custody battle, despite what felt like years of legal intimidation and harassment, Faustina shows an example of what addiction to chaos looks and feels like. Winning in family court after many years of feeling unseen and misunderstood by a legal system that isn’t trauma-informed, completely stunned her like a deer in the headlights.We discuss the fact that calm can feel threatening, that trauma wires your nervous system to seek more chaos, why peace showing up abruptly can be destabilizing, in order to plant the scenery for Episode 15-B where we will list 6 practical Tips to retrain the body to feel safe again. This mini-series about the addiction to chaos for trauma survivors, sets the stage for a deeper analysis about Emotional Detachment after narcissistic abuse.A story most single moms who have left relationships that felt narcissistic, intimidating and confusing, and who are carrying relationship or childhood trauma, and suddenly find themselves forced to adjust to some level of peace, will relate to. Faustina suggests we start thinking about surrender with the words, "Be still and know that I am God" as a great mantra for the transition out of chaos and into peace. Surrender is one of the mindset shifts that she built her newfound freedom around.After this practical description of behaviors and feelings, in Episodes 16A and 16B we then dive into the neurochemical aspect of the addiction to chaos, talk about the stress hormones, and suggest ways to get the neurochemical levels back to normal. This Season 2, Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, starting right here with the "addiction to chaos" mini-series is a Liberation Series that suggests things to look into as you rebuild yourself, so that you can become the version of yourself that is so detached emotionally, that you can prepare for family court correctly. Emotional detachment is where I want to help you get to, so that any recommendations I may have for court prep actually land. DETACH, BABY, DETACH!Here is the order I recommend for your healing journey towards emotional freedom, as you work to become a new version of yourself -the version that can actually win in court:First step is to think about not going back. There's a true addiction to chaos: ⁠Episode 15A⁠, ⁠Episode15B⁠, Episode 16A, Episode 16B. You then want to work with a therapist and see if you carry PTSD, and what types of therapy will help you heal the PTSD. For me, it was EMDR: Episode 17, Episode 18. You then want to see Forgiveness as a tactical advantage and as a massive step in your personal development. That's Episode 19. The next things to think about in yourliberation and in reclaiming your dignity, will be codependency and gratitude.Follow the show so you can hear the entire season 2 about Emotional Detachment. While you wait for the entire season 2 to come out about Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, check out Episode 9: The Court Date you Can't Stop Thinking About - Breaking the Anxiety Spiral⁠.KEYWORDSautistic single mom, narcissistic abuse recovery, trauma healing, nervous system regulation, custody battle, chaos addiction, addiction to chaos, life transition, NPD, ASD, Catholicism, court trauma, court battle, win a custody battle, post-abuse healing, trauma responses, high-conflict co-parenting, healing after abuse, emotional safety, breaking trauma patterns, Mental Health, Parenting, Self-Improvement, Trauma, Catholic Faith, Rosary, Jesus, spiritual warfare, demonic aspect of a court battle, legal abuseThis content is for general information and education only. It reflects lived experience and summaries of publicly available research. It is not medical, mental‑health, legal, or professional advice, and it isn’t a substitute for advice tailored to your situation. Please seek support from a qualified professional who understands your needs.

14. Healing from Gaslighting - Helping Your Child Feel Safe by Trusting Yourself First

After gaslighting, rebuilding your intuition and body signals is the foundation for helping your child feel emotionally safe.In this episode, we talk about what gaslighting is, how to heal from gaslighting, staying honest with your overwhelm, and modeling emotional safety for sensitive or neurodivergent kids. Faustina shares relatable, personal stories and real-life examples of learning to feel the emotions again, and humbly using those to model emotional intelligence to a sensitive child. If this helped you feel less alone, please leave a 5 star review — it genuinely helps other overwhelmed moms find this space. Healing from gaslighting is like finding strength in the storm that follows, with the post-separation dysfunctional dynamics that come after you leave. emotional safety for kidstrauma-informed parentingparenting after abuseoverwhelmed momsneurodivergent parentingPDA autism parentingsensitive childrenco-regulation strategieshealing from gaslightingnervous system regulationparenting when triggeredrebuilding intuitionoverwhelmed mom supportCatholic mom podcastmother wound healingemotional literacy for kidsparenting through dysregulationgentle parenting for trauma survivorsraising autistic or PDA childrenhow to stay calm with your childhealing your inner voiceteaching kids emotional regulation