The prize vase is broken. Could the accident have been avoided? Probably. Was the vase broken on purpose? Probably not. Does your son need to learn the lesson to be more careful? Absolutely. Now, your job as parent is to construct circumstances where that lesson will be learned and appreciated. If you choose punishment as your lesson-learning tool, your child may become more careful, but out of fear of further beatings. If you choose natural consequence as your lesson-learning tool, your child will also become more careful, but out of love and healthy relationship, understanding the cost and impact of his not being careful. Use active listening to calm his emotional fever around the accident. Then ask questions that will prompt his thinking about what he needs to do to make things right again. When in doubt, always choose natural consequence over punishment.
You Cannot Not Communicate
Dare to be Different in Active Listening
Kids Will Always Test the Limits
What You Say to Your Child Matters!
Maintaining Healthy Relationships
Kids Do Act Out, or Act In
Does your child steal?
When Trouble Comes Knocking
Is Your Child Having a Problem?
Don't Worry. Be Happy
Are You a Benevolent Despot?
How Do You Lead Your Family?
Launching Our Teen into Adulthood
Problems? How Can You Tell?
Tips for Family Stress Management
Should You Fight Your Child's Battles?
Correction with Time-Out
Parenting is Lifelong
Down Time, What A Blessing!
Emotional Fever? Active Listen
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