"Okay! Who made this mess?" Your question is met with a chorus of "not me's" When and how do you get to the truth? First, how important is the mess? If it directly affects you in the moment, then it needs to be straightened first. Deal with the lying later. Whatever the timing, when confronting the Not Me-er, make sure you child understands his choices. If he messed up and owns it, you have a teachable moment. You active listen his upset, ask permission to offer counsel, and help him with corrective steps. He may also get a consequence for his actions. If he messes up and lies about it by saying "I didn't do that," confirm the infraction independently, and then give two consequences, one for the mess up an one for lying about it. Lying can double the trouble.
That New Bundle of Joy is Now Part of your Family
As Parent, Stay On Top of Things
Formula for Best...Times...Ever
Me Time? Wait, Is That Allowed?
Choose Natural Consequence
Bed Time Can Be The Best Time
Getting What You Want from Parenting
Helping Your Children Get Along
Mission Accomplished, Teen to Adult
Promoting Positive Attention
Part of Being a Family
Worry Much?
You matter too!
The Age of Cybertechnology
What's Natural About Punishment?
Catch Teachable Moments When They Come Your Way
What Type of Parent Are You?
Effective Parenting is Both Listening & Confronting
Is that my Teen?
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