Michael Arterberry, the parable of the farmer and the donkey

Michael is Founder and Executive Director of the Youth Voices Center, New York, motivational speaker, and author of the book Be Encouraged! He was a social worker and counsellor for 22 year before starting his own business.

Michael likens his personal journey to that of a donkey who falls into a well. Unable to lift him out, his owner decides to bury him right there, but as he is shovelling the last spadefuls of dirt into the well, he sees the donkey’s ears appear over the rim of the well: the donkey has shaken off each shovelful of dirt and trodden on it. Eventually he makes his escape from the well.

Michael’s dad was an alcoholic, who died when Michael was 16. As a teenage Michael “never had a sense of balance.” During the day he was permanently anxious about what was going to greet him when he returned home. His mother raised four children on the income from her job as a housekeeper – his father’s earning went on alcohol. His neighbourhood was dysfunction with drugs, gangs and violence commonplace.

He found his passion for social work and youth coaching from surviving in such an environment.

When Michael started out on his own he developed a youth development programme called “Power of Peace”, which he took to high schools and middle schools. The programme incorporated staff development as well as student engagement. This led to the creation of his not-for-profit Youth Voices Center. His mission is “to help these young people to live quality lives” by “using obstacles as opportunities” and thereby breaking out of “the cycles that they come from.”

The programme is for 25 to 30 students. There are two levels of the programme, each of which runs for two full school days. The programme starts with an assembly run by Michael, with the aim of embedding the language of the programme in the entire school.

The pupil cohort is typically a cross-section of race and levels of attainment. This is to develop the ability of the students to build community with people who are different from themselves. The programme is interactive and provides an opportunity for students to reflect on their lives to date and appreciate the impact of some of the difficulties they have experienced.

Michael observes that if we don’t recognise the damage that may have occurred during such difficulties, those experiences can begin to dictate the decisions and the direction that we take subsequently. Many of his students have described the programme as a “life changing experience.”

Michael looks to broker a long-term relationship with the schools in which he works. In some instances he has been there 10 or 15 years. He says “I become a fixture in the building.” The students have to choose to progress to the second level of the programme, after which they become co-facilitators.

Until his children were born, Michael worked on the “Alternatives to Violence” project at the maximum security Green Harbour Correction Facility. This provided an opportunity for the inmates to reflect on their lives. The pleasure of it was in watching people become successful when they left prison.

He attributes the high incarceration rate in the United States – the highest in the world according to CNN – in part to the culture of the United States, which promotes “selfish lives… not worried about anybody but themselves.” He tells his young people the story of the crabs in a boiling pot: every time a crab tries to crawl out, one of the crabs on the inside pulls them back in. “Nobody is lifting each other up.”

He wonders if Covid-19 will be an opportunity for people to reflect on what matters have come to, but in the meantime Michael will continue to seek to serve the young people that he has an opportunity to help.

The basis for Michael’s leadership is his relationship with his heavenly father. He says it’s the “basis of all that I do in my life.” He tries to lead by example.

His proudest moment was becoming a father. At the same time he felt fearful at the prospect because he didn’t have a model for fatherhood. Fortunately Michael had a loving mother and he drew on his experience of her to help him.

The people that have inspired him most in life are the students that he has worked with. When he takes a class he always sees himself as a student, ready to learn from those he works with.

His book recommendation is ‘The Dream Giver’ by Bruce Wilkinson. It’s a book that encourages you to follow your dreams. It’s one of the reasons that Michael’s wife left a corporate career to become a writer.

Michael’s advice to his 20-year old self would be to be patient. His advice to students and friends nowadays is to live in the moment.

At present Michael is working on ‘The Shake the Dirt Experience,’ an online 11-week course which takes 20 adults at a time and follows a similar process to ‘The Power of Peace.’ The objective is for people to become “the driver of your car rather than just the passenger.”