Everyday Happiness - Finding Harmony and Bliss
Education:Self-Improvement
Today we’re talking about boundaries. We can’t have all of these episodes about time without talking about how to create some boundaries so that we can create that ultimate fulfilled happiness and flow with our time, our most precious resource. Let’s dig in.
Transcript:
Welcome to Everyday Happiness where we create lasting happiness, in about 2 minutes a day, through my signature method of Intentional Margins® (creating harmony between your to-dos and your priorities), happiness science, and musings about life.
I'm your host Katie Jefcoat, and I feel like we can’t have all of these episodes about time without talking about boundaries. We’ve all heard the saying, what you say yes to means you are saying no to something else. Whether that is literally saying no to another event or if it’s more subtle like getting less sleep or not being able to work on a project you want to because you said yes to something else that took up that block of time or just mental bandwidth.
Saying no helps us not put everyone else’s needs above our own. I like to ask people when we are one on one to look at their calendar and identify if those are your priorities or someone else's priorities.
Now, before you go on thinking that I can’t possibly delete other people’s priorities from my calendar, let me flush this out with you.
What if we think about boundaries not as rigid lines but more as guardrails to protect our Intentional Margins and our most important priorities, whether that is work or personal life. I honestly think boundaries give me more flexibility. This is because it’s very clear what I say yes to and what I say no to.
If I have a deep work session on my calendar because I have a deadline coming up and someone pings me for a meeting. I can say “I’m sorry, I’m already busy at that time”. Because I am. I am already allotting that time for my deep work. If I take that meeting, I’ve lost that time. And now I’m staying up late or skipping dinner and that doesn’t align with my priorities.
Of course, there are always exceptions. Say a boss asks you. You can easily say “that time is allocated to completing the xyz project, would you rather I stay focused on that deadline or jump into this new thing”. Then, you are honoring what your boss needs while also managing your time and priorities.
I have a pretty firm boundary about my evenings and when I like to go to sleep. Does that mean I don’t ever go to an evening event or do a live zoom class past 8pm. Of course not, but I know what I’m giving up and I can make that decision with all of the knowledge I have.
So, if boundaries have you thinking firm and rigid. I invite you to think of guardrails and flexibility. Do a quick audit of your calendar and see where you can set flexible time boundaries today.
Until next time, kindness is contagious.
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Links: https://onamission.bio/everydayhappiness/
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