1. Hillary is IN...but ONLY if you watched until the very end of that Kaiser Permanente video she’s passing off as a campaign announcement
2. Rand Paul is also in, and he’s already beating Hillary. Lindsay Graham is also in, but he’s only running against Rand. Former Republican Lincoln Chaffee’s also in, but just to make sure there’s someone to Hillary’s...left?
3. Republicans and racists alike have finally found a shooting of an unarmed black man they can denounce. So...progress?
4. Rahm Emanuel just barely avoids being Christine Quinn’d, can now victoriously continue closing schools and free health clinics. Hooray!
5. Tom Cotton has a detailed plan for Iran. Step one: Bomb them. Step two...actually there’s no step two. It’s a simple plan, really.
6. Finally, we’ll take a terrifying walk down memory lane and revisit the news of BTL #1!