Les, Kurt, and Jason lament the essential cancellation of Halloween as we know it, walk of shame and all. (Poor slutty David S. Pumpkin costumes will have to wait until next year). They also offer huge congrats to our friend David Rosen of the Piecing it Together Podcast on his marriage… even if it takes the guys a second to piece together what the name of his podcast is. The Blac Chyna news leads everyone down a rabbit hole about whether it’s easier to transition to porn to so-called legit acting work or vice versa… and whether or not character actors can do it (picture Ed Asner naked, you are welcome). Then, it’s time to embrace the season of FALLmark and Falling for Look Lodge, a Hallmark movie bursting at the seams with the most white people stereotype ever: being really into autumn! Even with boring trivia games, an understaffed and underpopulated lodge, a super weird energy cake tasting, a sinister sister that would totally be a murderous stalker in any other movie, and a dude that’s into a turtle more than a woman (which is obvious to everyone but the woman), the biggest takeaway is that every Hallmark movie is basically Baby Boom. And that Linda Evans used to be married to Yanni.
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Theme song generously donated by purple-planet.com
The Wrong Prince Charming Has Created a Pyramid Scheme Full of Vivica A. Fox’s HR Violations
Roadhouse Romance Steals From Patrick Swayze Movies and Violates Many Health Codes
Harry & Meghan: Escaping the Palace: Enhanced Edition: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire
The Wrong Cheer Captain Is A Cautionary Tale About Nicotine Vaping and Calling 911 on Speaker Phone
Do You Trust Your Boyfriend For Being Catfished, Liking Birds, and Wearing Tube Socks?
The 27 Hour Day Doesn’t Have Trivia But Does Have a Pig Montage
This College Professor Obsession is Nightclub Attire + Adrian Zmed + Eyes Wide Shut Style Parties
Love at the Ranch Should Be about a Strapping Young Male Cyclops Cyborg Ghostwriter
Stalked by My Doctor: The Return of Eric Roberts Posing as a Doctor That’s in Your Health Insurance Network
You Had Me at Aloha Says Hello to Goats Having a Moment and Goodbye to 2 Hours of Your Night
Unlike the Friends Reunion, Deceitful Dating Does Not Have a Cameo from Malala Yousafzai
Sweet Carolina is a Two-Way Street of Doucheiness with Motivational Tips from Pinterest
Stalked By My Doctor Eric Roberts, Doll Sniffer and Dodge Stratus Driver
Sun, Sand, and Romance Makes an Indecent Proposal to Suzanne Pleshette
A CPR Doll and a Truly Amazingly Insane Movie are Just What the Doctor Ordered
Right in Front of Me are Fred Gwynne, a Scientologist, and 5 Maraschino Cherries
Beware of the Midwife Holding Chloroform and aTruly Gigantic Baby
One Perfect Wedding Proves That Hallmark is Ready to Show Some Clavicle Now
Always the Brutal Bridesmaids, Never the Stripper Who Might Be One of the Producers
Chasing Waterfalls Shows Us a Whole New Hallmark Channel Complete with Old Prospectors Panning for Gold
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