Stefanie Myr is the head route setter, manager, and team coach at Climb Tacoma in WA. We met up in Leavenworth and talked about our similar upbringings in Christianity, why we both moved away from religion, finding “church” in the climbing community, confidence and self-belief, unique challenges as a short climber, being less certain and more curious, Stef’s polyamorous relationship with her husband and partner, compersion, honest communication, doing what you can to make the world a little better, and much more!
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Show Notes:
thenuggetclimbing.com/episodes/stefanie-myr
Nuggets:
0:04:05 – Miniature carpentry, and a gift for me
0:11:49 – Stef role at Climb Tacoma, and the gym as a core part of her community
1:17:19 – How she first got a job at Climb Tacoma, and having a diverse group of people on the team
0:20:16 – Stef’s unique financial situation, and the sustainability of working at a climbing gym
0:22:38 – Moving away from her Christian upbringing, and finding “church” at the climbing gym
0:25:09 – Our parallels with church music and moving away from organized religion
0:30:31 – Bullet point lists, and how the gym functions like a “church”
0:32:07 – Meeting people who changed the way we thought about organized religion
0:35:16 – Stef’s upbringing and programming, and not realizing she was bisexual until college
0:38:39 – Stef’s husband Julien
0:40:34 – Stef’s confidence, choosing Giant Man as an objective, and gaining something from every climb
0:46:17 – Frustration with height and grades, and needing to be V12 strong to climb V10
0:48:02 – My conversation with Nic Rummel about grades, and an announcement about the Patron show being on Spotify
0:51:19 – Sending Pimpsqueak V8/9 in Leavenworth, ABR (always be rolling), and why recording send videos feels important
0:56:02 – The power of seeing someone like you climb hard things
1:00:42 – More about confidence, embracing powerful moves, learning from coaching little kids, and unlocking pieces of the puzzle
1:08:18 – The moments that show you that you’ve gotten better at climbing, and Stef’s mountain
1:10:23 – Stef’s dream boulder in Goldbar WA, and other goals in Leavenworth
1:12:01 – How Stef got on The Nugget
1:21:52 – Self-belief, wanting to be good, and the power of affirmation
1:26:17 – Our brain’s reaction to negative comments, and how Stef deals with trolls
1:38:02 – The lawyer in my brain, and making people think differently by asking better questions
1:39:51 – Less certain more curious
1:42:47 – Stef’s polyamorous relationship, and why she wanted to talk about it
1:50:50 – Normalizing sex, and redefining cheating in an open relationship
1:56:18 – Equating sex and intimacy to love, how cool her husband is, and the story of how she came to be with her partner
2:03:22 – Jealousy, and honest communication
2:05:32 – Why Stef wanted to talk about her open relationship, and why people who are poly are not free-for-alls
2:09:53 – Bringing all of who you are to yourself as a climber
2:11:53 – Compersion
2:15:11 – The depth of her relationship with her husband before they opened their relationship, and the distinction between security and trust
2:17:53 – Marriage, and Stef’s future with her partner
2:24:47 – Double the love and laundry, and Stef’s life in a go bag
2:26:50 – Check-ins, RADAR, smoking weed, and “ask don’t assume”
2:32:23 – Double-committing, and learning to communicate her plans
2:39:18 – What Stef wishes people spent more time thinking about
2:41:10 – Make the world a little better
2:42:20 – My episode with Ethan Pringle about his dad, and the importance of airing out the messiness
2:47:35 – Stef’s sponsors
2:51:08 – Pursuing the child-free life, and final thoughts
EP 133: Neil Gresham — Using Ballet to Climb Harder, Developing Your Finishing Game, and Extensor Training for Stronger Fingers
EP 132: Rebecca Williams — A Deep Dive Into Fear of Falling, the Self-Soothing System, and Climbing Smarter
EP 131: Ryan Devlin — Life as a TV Actor, Progressing From 11b to 12c in a Year, and How Pro Climbers Relate to Struggle
EP 130: Stian Christophersen & Martin Mobråten — Writing The Climbing Bible, Finger Strength vs. General Strength, and Strategies for Improving Technique
Follow-Up: Matt Fultz — How to Train for the Hardest Crimp Boulders in the World (Teaser)
EP 129: Dorian Evers — How to Navigate Different Stoke Levels in Your Relationship, and Getting Vulnerable with Your Partner
EP 128: Callie Joy Black — Training During Pregnancy, Climbing Hard with Kids, and Being Your Own Project
Follow-Up: Steve Maisch — My Summer Training Plan, and How to Get Stronger on the Moonboard (Teaser)
EP 127: Jesse Firestone — Bouldering Tactics, Quantum Leaps, and Non-Physical Factors That Affect Our Performance
BONUS: Michelle LeBlanc — An Upcoming 2SLGBTQ+ Pride Event in Squamish
S1E2: The Great Equalizer (Repost from The American Climbing Project)
EP 126: Devin Dabney — Getting Uncomfortable, How Climbing Saved His Life, and How Competition Makes Us Better
Follow-Up: Alita Contreras — Sending Her First 5.14a, and Training With Lattice (Teaser)
EP 125: Zofia Reych — The Heritage of Climbing, Breaking Down Gender Roles, and What It’s Like to Be Autistic
EP 124: Karly Rager — Mental Strategies for Developing Focus, Learning vs. Performing, and Building a Coaching Business
EP 123: Magnus Midtbø — The Hard Work Behind Success, Go-To Climbing Workouts, and Takeaways from Training with Adam Ondra
Follow-Up: Chad Andrews — The Pros and Cons of Living on the Road to Climb, and Having a Healthier Relationship with Money (Teaser)
EP 122: Jared Vagy — How to Prevent Knee, Shoulder, Elbow, and Finger Injuries as Climbers
EP 121: Carol Simpson — Being a Girl in the South in the 1950s, Yoga as the Fountain of Youth, and Ageism in Climbing
EP 120: Lea Volpe — The World of Paraclimbing Competitions, How We Perceive Wheelchairs, and Empathy in Coaching
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