Stefanie Myr is the head route setter, manager, and team coach at Climb Tacoma in WA. We met up in Leavenworth and talked about our similar upbringings in Christianity, why we both moved away from religion, finding “church” in the climbing community, confidence and self-belief, unique challenges as a short climber, being less certain and more curious, Stef’s polyamorous relationship with her husband and partner, compersion, honest communication, doing what you can to make the world a little better, and much more!
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Show Notes:
thenuggetclimbing.com/episodes/stefanie-myr
Nuggets:
0:04:05 – Miniature carpentry, and a gift for me
0:11:49 – Stef role at Climb Tacoma, and the gym as a core part of her community
1:17:19 – How she first got a job at Climb Tacoma, and having a diverse group of people on the team
0:20:16 – Stef’s unique financial situation, and the sustainability of working at a climbing gym
0:22:38 – Moving away from her Christian upbringing, and finding “church” at the climbing gym
0:25:09 – Our parallels with church music and moving away from organized religion
0:30:31 – Bullet point lists, and how the gym functions like a “church”
0:32:07 – Meeting people who changed the way we thought about organized religion
0:35:16 – Stef’s upbringing and programming, and not realizing she was bisexual until college
0:38:39 – Stef’s husband Julien
0:40:34 – Stef’s confidence, choosing Giant Man as an objective, and gaining something from every climb
0:46:17 – Frustration with height and grades, and needing to be V12 strong to climb V10
0:48:02 – My conversation with Nic Rummel about grades, and an announcement about the Patron show being on Spotify
0:51:19 – Sending Pimpsqueak V8/9 in Leavenworth, ABR (always be rolling), and why recording send videos feels important
0:56:02 – The power of seeing someone like you climb hard things
1:00:42 – More about confidence, embracing powerful moves, learning from coaching little kids, and unlocking pieces of the puzzle
1:08:18 – The moments that show you that you’ve gotten better at climbing, and Stef’s mountain
1:10:23 – Stef’s dream boulder in Goldbar WA, and other goals in Leavenworth
1:12:01 – How Stef got on The Nugget
1:21:52 – Self-belief, wanting to be good, and the power of affirmation
1:26:17 – Our brain’s reaction to negative comments, and how Stef deals with trolls
1:38:02 – The lawyer in my brain, and making people think differently by asking better questions
1:39:51 – Less certain more curious
1:42:47 – Stef’s polyamorous relationship, and why she wanted to talk about it
1:50:50 – Normalizing sex, and redefining cheating in an open relationship
1:56:18 – Equating sex and intimacy to love, how cool her husband is, and the story of how she came to be with her partner
2:03:22 – Jealousy, and honest communication
2:05:32 – Why Stef wanted to talk about her open relationship, and why people who are poly are not free-for-alls
2:09:53 – Bringing all of who you are to yourself as a climber
2:11:53 – Compersion
2:15:11 – The depth of her relationship with her husband before they opened their relationship, and the distinction between security and trust
2:17:53 – Marriage, and Stef’s future with her partner
2:24:47 – Double the love and laundry, and Stef’s life in a go bag
2:26:50 – Check-ins, RADAR, smoking weed, and “ask don’t assume”
2:32:23 – Double-committing, and learning to communicate her plans
2:39:18 – What Stef wishes people spent more time thinking about
2:41:10 – Make the world a little better
2:42:20 – My episode with Ethan Pringle about his dad, and the importance of airing out the messiness
2:47:35 – Stef’s sponsors
2:51:08 – Pursuing the child-free life, and final thoughts
EP 148: Alan Watts (Repost) — A Life at Smith Rock, Eating Every Other Day, and Meeting Adam Ondra
BONUS: Alita Contreras — Guerreras Film!
Announcing Merch!
EP 147: Alayna Joy — Coming out to 400k Subscribers, Queerness in Climbing, and Compulsory Heterosexuality
EP 146: Todd Perkins — The Mind-Opening Effects of Cannabis, Why Gratitude is the Key to Climbing Longevity, and Near-Death Experiences
Follow-Up: Amity Warme — Sending ‘The Honeymoon Is Over’ in a Hailstorm, and Lessons From Another Season in Yosemite (Teaser)
EP 145: Katie Lamb — Breaking Into V14, Embracing Micro Beta, and How Climbers Can Be Leaders in the Climate Movement
EP 144: Marisa Michael — Why Losing Weight Won’t Make You Climb Harder, How to Navigate Food, and Intuitive Eating
EP 143: Matt Heyliger — Tissue Capacity vs. Biomechanics, Why Mobility Comes Before Strength, and the Eyeball Story
EP 142: Aidan Roberts — Training for Alphane V17, the Power of Replicas, and Embracing Your Style
EP 141: Robbie Phillips — Exploring Scottish Sea Cliffs, Keeping Things Fun, and Capturing Memories Through Filmmaking
EP 140: Tommy Caldwell — Undone Lines on El Cap, Father-Son Relationships, and Exploring the Limits of Human Endurance
EP 139: Lynn Hill — Breaking Barriers in Climbing, How to Find Self-Belief, and Challenging Social Norms
EP 138: Q&A 6 (feat. Taylor Fragomeni) — Ways to Improve Your Climbing if Access is Limited, and More Patron Questions
Follow-Up: Ned Feehally — More Beastmaking Questions, and Longer Hangs for Long-Term Strength Gains (Teaser)
EP 137: Drew Ruana & Cameron Hörst — Lessons from Recent Sends, Training for Bouldering vs. Sport Climbing, and Leveling Up to V18 and 5.15c
EP 136: Dan Varian — High Angle Crimps, Silver Bullets in Finger Strength, and How to Activate Lazy Fingers
EP 135: Alice Hafer — How to Train Your Mind Muscle, Tips for Staying Motivated, and Box Jumps for Power
EP 134: Sam Van Boxtel — Creating Value on Social Media, Having a Strong “Why”, and the Road to 100k Followers
Follow-Up: Jonathan Siegrist — How to Climb Hard Sport Routes and Improve for Decades (Teaser)
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